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THE CHALLENGE: FREE AGENTS Preseason Power Rankings – Women Division – Part I

April 7, 2014 David Bloom Leave a comment

Culture Challenged will be following The Challenge: Free Agents every step of the way this season with commentary, interviews, recaps, Zapruder film analysis, and weekly power rankings.

The Men rankings can be found here: Part I Part II

And then it begins…on to part 1 of the The Challenge: Free Agents Preseason Power Rankings – Women Division.

PRESEASON POWER RANKINGS – WOMEN DIVISION

THE ROOKIE

14) LATOYA

Where did we last see her? The last time we saw LaToya she was BFFing with Marie and giving Swifty the habitual cold shoulder on Real World: ~~Seclusion~~ St. Thomas.

CHALLENGE History: She is a rookie on The Challenge: Free Agents.

From her MTV bio: Feisty and energetic, rookie LaToya comes into this game focused on one thing, making it to the end. LaToya reveals, “I don’t care about all the beefs. I’m here for the almighty dollar.” LaToya may not be into creating drama, but she isn’t afraid to stand up for herself. Upon learning the game-changing format, LaToya is confident about her chances despite her rookie status. She declares, “The new kids on the block actually have a chance, a strong chance at winning.” Look for this newbie to make an impression, but could her wild-card status make her a target?

Why would you sign LaToya? As the MTV bio contends, she is “feisty and energetic” and this can be a good thing. She did manage to stay out of most of the drama on her Real World season and seems to get along really well with other women. When push comes to shove, she will defend herself.

Why would you not sign LaToya? She appears to be a classic Challenge rookie: happy to be there, but not going to stay for very long – in year one you pay your dues. When watching Real World: ~~ill-advised location~~ St. Thomas, the only person who seemed less of natural fit for The Challenge was Brandon. On a pure physical comparison, she may have a hard time up against the more physically dominating fellow women of this season (Laurel, Nia, Jemmye, Nany, Aneesa).

Potential Allies: Challenge rookies and sophomores like Jessica and Nia; I have a feeling she is going to hit it off with Jasmine

Potential Enemies: Have she and Swifty worked out their business? Veterans looking to target a rookie, but are afraid of Hurricane Nia may target LaToya.

Best-case scenario: Some internal dissension among the women target strong competitors first to go into eliminations, and LaToya sticks around longer than expected.

Worst-case scenario: LaToya’s rookie status places her in the first elimination and “The Draw” comes up with a veteran competitor who will not be losing to a rookie in a first elimination.

The Verdict: I am not sure what to make of LaToya’s participation this year on The Challenge, but I think it will be both short and memorable enough to want to see her come back another time.

SOPHOMORES

13) EMILEE

Where did we last see her? Emilee’s last Challenge ride was as the original Captain of the Blue Team on Cutthroat. She and fellow Real World: Cancun castmate, Derek, were eliminated in the first episode.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Emilee’s second Challenge and the first episode of this season will also be her second episode on The Challenge in light of her aforementioned early elimination on Cutthroat (season 20).

From her MTV bio: Last seen being eliminated first on Cutthroat, Emilee is back for a second chance on Free Agents. This Boston native may not be the most intimidating athlete in the house, but believes she has what it takes to excel in other aspects of the game. She confides, “I’m really great when it comes to puzzles. I’ve got a brain and it’s not all good looks and girlish charm.” Fun and flirtatious, Emilee quickly sets her sights on a newly single guy, but discovers that on The Challenge, competition isn’t limited to the playing field. Watch for Emilee to make a new rival when they clash over one guy’s affections.

Why would you sign Emilee? Her first Challenge experience was so short that people may underestimate her. She could be afforded both the benefits of being a rookie (people are intrigued, fresh start) and may not have to face some of the downsides (first person targeted). She is a Boston native. Her little Real World: Cancun group of women could make some collective noise (and I am not referring to that one night a Challenge in which Jasmine has a little too much to drink).

Why would you not sign Emilee? For all intensive purposes, she is like a rookie and this may not be the best thing. Her elimination on Cutthroat was a long time ago and some of the game’s women power players have changed since then. There traditionally aren’t that many puzzles on The Challenge.

Potential Allies: Jonna and Jasmine (Cancun Strong); fellow “Bostonians” CT and Johnny and current resident Zach

Potential Enemies: Whomever this “new rival” is alluded to in her bio

Best-case scenario: The best-case scenario is that Emilee gets a favorable match-up in an early elimination, wins, and then manages to stay out of the limelight longer into this game than expected.

Worst case scenario: The winners have a soft spot for LaToya and are afraid of Nia, so Emilee is the next logical first women thrown into the first elimination.

The Verdict: This is a deep group of strong women and I just don’t see Emilee surviving beyond the first two or three episodes. Prove me wrong, fellow Bostonian!

12) DEVYN

Where did we last see her? We last saw Devyn, although a breakout interview star throughout the season, struggling to compete against the formidable Namibian Desert maelstrom that was the Battle of the Seasons final challenge.

CHALLENGE History: Battle of the Seasons (season 23) was Devyn’s first finals appearance on her first Challenge (fellow Brooklyn alums Sarah and Chet had a little bit to do with this).

From her MTV bio: We last saw Devyn being dragged up a sand dune by her teammates in the final challenge of Battle of the Seasons, where she took third place. Although you’re still more likely to find this NYC diva shopping on Fifth Avenue than hitting the gym, Devyn is ready to quiet the haters and prove it takes more than muscle to win The Challenge. She explains, “I’ve gotten a lot of comments that I’m not athletic or people think that I can’t compete. But I don’t think you have to be a fitness pro to win this.” Devyn is a shrewd political player and extremely well liked by her fellow competitors. Can Devyn make up for her weaknesses on the field with crafty gameplay? Or will this fierce fashionista unravel under pressure?

Why would you would sign Devyn? She has an infectious and hilarious personality and excels at the social game. Besides a situation in which teammates have to rely on her to perform athletically, she is always a joy to have around. Battle of the Seasons must have given a taste of what it means to compete, knowledge that she can use to her advantage this time around.

Why would you not sign Devyn? Despite her proclamations that you don’t have to be “a fitness pro to win this,” endurance is a component of the final challenge and if you don’t have it, you won’t be able to win. The Battle of the Seasons format played to her strengths (great teammate, positive attitude, hysterical), but Free Agents may play to her weaknesses (athletic and competitive drive).

Potential Allies: Doesn’t everyone get along with Devyn? She and LaToya are going to be fast friends (if only there were shopping options in Uruguay).

Potential Enemies: The heat of her hair

Best-case scenario: I think a finish somewhere in the middle is the best-case scenario for Devyn. The women at the top of this bracket are just too strong to make it that far. I can see her having a gutsy elimination win where she proves everybody wrong. There is also a scenario where other competitors keep her around because they see her as someone they can beat in the Finals. However, in a an every person for his or herself format, it is going to be most difficult to fall through any cracks and this scenario is highly unlikely.

Worst-case scenario: Her worst-case scenario is bad luck with “The Draw” and a tough elimination competitor to face because Devyn is not going to get picked to go in early eliminations.

The Verdict: Anything in the range of the top seven or eight women is a victory for Devyn and I have feeling she is going to get there, but not much further. We viewers all benefit from having her comedic potential around as long as possible, so let us hope that her sophomore slump is not too dramatic.

THE WILDCARD

11) NIA

Where did we last see her? Nia was last seen embodying a natural weather phenomenon in the Real World: Portland house, leaving a path of fear, destruction, and devastation in her wake.

CHALLENGE History: Although Nia is a Challenge rookie, her stormy reputation will not be a surprise to anyone.

From her MTV bio: “Hurricane” Nia was last seen wreaking havoc on the Real World: Portland where she terrorized her roommates. Having matured and mellowed from the experience, this Challenge rookie assures that she is more interested in competition than stirring things up in the house. Nia declares, “I do intimidate people, but not on purpose. I don’t really know what it’s like to lose. I am going to win. There is no other option.” Nia may have the competitive drive it takes to win the Challenge, but will she be able to hold back her inner hurricane?

Why would you sign Nia? When she says, “I don’t really know what it’s like to lose. I am going to win,” you believe her. When she says, “I do intimidate people, but not on purpose,” the consideration of the intent is lost in the intimidation factor. She has spent lots of time around professional athletes (according to her book on dating) and may have picked up some moves. She is a tall and strong woman who will have many a physical advantage over the majority of her fellow women. A “matured and mellowed” Nia added on to the dominating force that she already is could be a dangerous thing for other competitors.

Why would you not sign Nia? “Will she be able to hold back her inner hurricane?” – this is a fair question. Those who do not fear her will want her eliminated as soon as possible.

Potential Allies: Jess (Portland Strong)

Potential Enemies: Certainly Johnny and maybe Jordan (Portland Not So Strong); There is no way she and Camila (a tropical storm at times in her own right) see eye to eye

Best-case scenario: Nia decidedly wins challenges and eliminations, corrals her weather systems, and works her way to a conceivable shot at the finals.

Worst-case scenario: Hurricane Nia detection has improved since Portland. Some of the savvier veterans target her early and often in an attempt to diffuse her threat.

The Verdict: Part of the experience of Hurricane Nia on Real World: Portland was unpredictability. Unpredictability is not something that usually succeeds on The Challenge. I think Nia may struggle to find her footing in her rookie campaign.

SOMETHING TO PROVE

10) THERESA

Where did we last see her? An original competitor from Fresh Meat II, Theresa had one of her most memorable Challenges on Rivals 2. Unfortunately, the erroneous team vote for Leroy ended up being strategically misguided.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Theresa’s fifth season. Previous seasons include Fresh Meat II (season 19), Cutthroat (season 20), Rivals (season 21), and Rivals 2 (season 24). Her best previous finish was Top 5 (among women) on Fresh Meat II.

From her MTV bio: Returning for her fifth challenge, Theresa is optimistic about her chances in Free Agents. Hampered in past games by relationship drama and unreliable partners, Theresa is ready to let her impressive athletic abilities speak for themselves. She explains, “Since my friends usually always screw me over in this game, I love that I can rely on myself and only myself.” Theresa may be comfortable with the physical aspects of the Challenge, but she’ll have to dig deep to harness the mental toughness it takes to win. Theresa notes, “If you get me riled up, I don’t keep my cool.” Will Free Agents give Theresa the opportunity to shine? Or is she one outburst away from a plane ticket home?

Why would you sign Theresa? Like her Fresh Meat II cast mate Brandon, this could be a make or break season for Theresa on The Challenge, so her level of competitiveness may be heightened. She has not traditionally been matched with the most dominant teams or partners, so the individual format could be to her advantage. She is one tough cookie and will not back down from anyone (This pugnacity landed her spots on Rivals opposite Camila and Rivals 2 opposite Jasmine). You can sense her hunger.

Why would you not sign Theresa? Despite circumstances out of her control, her track record is not the strongest (she has never been within an elimination of the finals). Relationship drama seems to follow her during most Challenges. Her pugnacity is sometimes on the edge of volatility.

Potential Allies: Jasmine (Rivals 2 Strong)

Potential Enemies: Laurel, Cara Maria; Things did not end well with Jordan

Best-case scenario: The Free Agents format caters to Theresa’s talents and she becomes one of the key competitors in challenges, winning some, and avoiding early eliminations. With a little bit of luck from the infamous “The Draw,” she could be a long shot to make the finals.

Worst-case scenario: She seals her partner for Rivals 3 early on. This bodes well for her return for another season, but does not bode well for Free Agents.

The Verdict: I could go either way on Theresa. She and Nia are definitely the two from the back half of the preseason rankings who I would not be surprised to see in the top group at the end. I do not for a second question Theresa’s drive to compete and have a hunch she is going to be around for a while, but if the trailer does in fact show us an elimination round against Laurel, that will mark the end of her game.

9) JASMINE

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jasmine, despite an embarrassing women voting debacle in her second to last week, have one of her best Challenge performances to date on Rivals 2 (while partnered with Theresa).

CHALLENGE History: Incredibly, Free Agents is Jasmine’s fifth straight season on The Challenge. Previously she appeared on Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), Battle of the Seasons (season 23), and Rivals 2 (season 24). Her best finish was in the top 8 (of women) on Battle of the Seasons.

From her MTV bio: Pint-size siren Jasmine made it halfway through Rivals II paired with her nemesis, Theresa. Having conquered her fears, Jasmine is excited to compete on her own. Jasmine reveals, “Free Agents, this is the kind of challenge for me. I think people are going to be really surprised because I can really hold my own and I’ve got some fight in me.” Prepared for anything, Jasmine is determined to enjoy her time on Free Agents and immediately sets her sights on a younger man. Jasmine confesses, “I’m single, I’m gonna have a little bit of fun. So, that’s what I’m gonna do right now.” Will Jasmine’s small stature hold her back? Or can she prove Free Agents really is anyone’s game?

Why would you sign Jasmine? Jasmine can be so much fun to have around and now that she is “single,” watch out. No one has ever questioned her fight or drive (maybe her state of sanity when intoxicated though). Despite a slightly better finish on Battle of the Seasons than on Rivals 2, she has performed so much better on her last two Challenges than she did on her first two Challenges. She is trending up for a reason.

Why would you not sign Jasmine? Her size continues to have some limitations in physical challenges and the women this season are not getting any smaller. Her track record on The Challenge is mixed at best and Jasmine may be better served on a larger team (as was the case on Battle of the Seasons) than all by herself.

Potential Allies: It’s complicated, but Jonna and Emilee (interesting Real World: Cancun cohort), Theresa (Rivals 2 strong)

Potential Enemies: Dating back to her first two seasons…wine glasses.

Best-case scenario: Jasmine gets lucky, stays out of eliminations because of her strong social game, and when she does have to go in, faces someone who she can beat. She lasts until the middle of the season.

Worst-case scenario: The worst-case scenario involves some misfortune courtesy of “The Draw” and is then physically overmatched in an early elimination.

The Verdict: Barring some crummy luck, Jasmine is going to make it into the middle rounds of this game (Top 8 or 9 women), but will not go much further than that.

8) JONNA

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jonna struggle with electrocution and partner communication on her second to last challenge before losing to Cara Maria and Cooke in a late game Rivals 2 Jungle Elimination.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Jonna’s third straight Challenge season and fourth overall. Her Team Cancun almost made the finals on Battle of the Seasons (season 23). She was on Rivals (season 21) and Rivals 2 (season 24).

From her MTV bio: Reeling from a series of dramatic Challenge showmances, Jonna has one priority this season, herself. She confesses, “Every single Challenge that I competed in, I’ve always been concerned about someone else. But this time around it’s about me.” With a brand-new mindset, Jonna comes into Free Agents on a mission to prove she’s a real contender, “I’m here to prove to everyone and even more importantly, prove to myself that I am a strong, confident woman.” Will Jonna succeed on her mission and reach a final at last? Or will she once again become a Challenge casualty?

Why would you sign Jonna? Each of the past two seasons, she has had strong male partnerships. She is a strong performer in challenges. As stated in her bio, she comes into Free Agents with a little chip on her shoulder and something to prove to the competition.

Why would you not sign Jonna? Can she stay away from showmances that may not always be the best thing for her game? Jonna can sometimes have rocky relationships with some of the other women competitors. She has yet to prove how well she can do on her own (strong teams and partnerships have helped her succeed on the last two seasons)

Potential Allies: Jasmine and Emilee (Cancun Strong); Nany (Rivals 2 Strong); Frank

Potential Enemies: What remains from her relationships with Zach and Jordan?

Best-case scenario: Jonna gets her game over the hump, is all about Jonna, and competes at the kind of high level she is capable of, giving her an outside shot into the top group of finals prospective participants.

Worst-case scenario: Jonna has another shomance, but this time, the Free Agents format puts a target on her chest that forces her into an early elimination against the not so luck of “The Draw.”

The Verdict: On a totally subjective hunch, I would not be surprised if this is not Jonna’s best season and she leaves the show earlier than expected. I could also be easily convinced of the opposite, but I will embrace and own my feeling that Jonna will “once again become a Challenge casualty.”

READY TO SHOCK

7) JESSICA

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jess, albeit ever so briefly, earning her Challenge nickname, Princess Hulk, for her valiant performance in defeat in the second episode of Rivals 2.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents is Jessica’s second season on The Challenge. She and partner Anastasia (a tough go on her first The Challenge season) were eliminated in their second episode.

From her MTV bio: Good girl Jessica left Rivals II following her partner Anastasia’s epic meltdown. No longer held back by a teammate, Free Agents is Jessica’s chance to show what she’s made of. Jessica proclaims, “I don’t think people see me as a threat this time because I didn’t last very long in the previous Challenge. I have to play it cool and then just bam, hit them with it.” Although she claims she’s not looking for romance in the house, Jessica is all smiles when she makes an instant love connection. Don’t underestimate this former pageant queen—when it comes to performing in challenges, she just might shock everyone.

Why would you sign Jessica? Jessica is making personal training her profession and enters Free Agents in phenomenal shape. When asked to perform athletically (anything involving heights may be the exception), she is primed to dominate. Without many complicated past relationships, she brings a fresh perspective to the festivities that will be particularly useful in the “nothing to lose, everything to win” solo mission that will be Free Agents.

Why would you not sign Jessica? Her first season could not have been shorter, so she comes into Free Agents as basically a rookie. She is not too aware of the hows and whys of the social/strategic game.

Potential Allies: Nia (Portland Strong), LaToya

Potential Enemies: Zach; CT; unnecessary drama; Camila

Best-case scenario: Get ready: Jessica’s best-case scenario is an outside chance at being in the top group of women with a potential shot at making the finals.

Worst-case scenario: Free Agents is dominated by veteran alliances and Jess is unable to clean off the lingering rookie dust, forcing her into early elimination battles against formidable foes pulled from “The Draw.”

The Verdict: My The Challenge bold predictions have always had a wide range of outcomes (some obviously more successful than others), but I won’t let it stop me here. Bold Prediction: Jessica “might just shock everyone” and is a dark horse candidate to make the finals. I was surprised when she made an appearance in one the few MTV promotional videos airing on television (one featured CT, one featured Bananas, one featured the always entertaining, Camila) and I have a feeling that this was intentional on MTV’s part. I look for her to have a breakout second season on The Challenge: Free Agents.

PART II will come out later in the week.

"The Challenge", Features, Television

The Challenge: Free Agents Trailer – A Zapruder Analysis

March 12, 2014 David Bloom Leave a comment

Most major professional sports have offseasons filled with blockbuster trades, upside loaded drafts where we hear constantly about things like wingspan, player signing periods, and a consistent flow of media attention (something has to fill all twenty four hours of television programming on ESPN and its numerous subsidiaries). The Challenge, widely accepted at this point as the fifth major professional sport (at least in the United States, international football nitpickers), is uniquely kept under a contracted (designed to be Frank Sweeney proof) veil of secrecy. Some early rumors sustain our rampant excitement, but can they be trusted? What if a speculated participant’s strange twitter absence this fall was due to an intended social media purge and not because they were in some remote location filming? If MTV and challengers won’t confirm the inevitable competitor picture collage that surfaces, should we consider it reliable?

All of this uncertainty surrounding the twenty fifth (Twenty five seasons! Incredible!) of The Challenge faced its celebrated demise earlier this week when official cast pictures were unwrapped for the new season. With an enormous appetite officially whetted, today the first appetizer course was served. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present you the first trailer for The Challenge: Free Agents:

Things just got real. It is time for my annual “Zapruder Analysis” (frame by frame dissection) of this scintillating sixty seconds of glorious footage. So we begin…

0:01 – This opening aerial shot of the maze-like collision star set against the foreboding underscoring is an immediate tone-setter. “Welcome to The Challenge. Warning: competitive danger lies ahead.” One second in and the excitement level could not possibly higher.

0:02 – I have watched this collision back now several dozen times, and this is the real deal, people. Nany obliterates Cara Maria (finally here to start a season for a change!) head on and then ricochets into the modern Amazonian goddess, Laurel (Welcome back! We missed you). The Challenge: Free Agents is a full-contact sport and will show no mercy.

0:04 – In case you have any doubts about just how dangerous things will get, this burning demonstration should dispel these doubts.

0:05: “This season, it’s an individual game – Free Agents,” explains TJ Lavin the Great. The time had come for a move to a more individual game free from the alliances of old and the attempts to dethrone them of the new. One bittersweet realization is that Sarah will not be competing for the first time in seven challenges. No one deserves a shot at individual The Challenge glory more than Sarah who had the misfortune of being teamed up with a quitting partner (Trishelle on Rivals 2), Devyn in an endurance heavy final (on Battle of the Seasons, although I am happy to see Devyn compete a second time), and a partner who assaulted another competitor (Vinny on Exes). Can’t she be a late game arrival like Cara Maria? Could she at least be brought on this time as “The Confessioner?” Let us hope. In the meantime, Cara’s reaction to TJ’s announcement is without a price.

0:06 – TJ Lavin the Great without a hat and his “flow” haircut underneath? This season does promise to have many changes.

0:11 – CT’s soundbite: “I’ve always been a free agent. Now everybody’s gonna have to play my game.” The defending champion and Boston’s strongest is back! I agree with him. This season could have been called The Challenge: Experience what CT goes through every year. My question is, like in the other four major professional sports, can you sign free agents to work for your team? Great season title, Bunim-Murray.

0:17 – Lost in the “challenges that are up high are really scary” surface level understanding of these images is the triumphant return of Jessica, last season’s surprising Real World: Portland alum. The heroic valiance of her Princess Hulk final performances was not lost on this loyal Challenge commentator (nor was her dedicated offseason workout regimen). My preseason power rankings are forthcoming (sometime in the next three weeks), but I have a feeling Jessica’s placement is going to surprise a lot of people. Bold prediction: she is one of the handful of competitors to watch this season and could go deep.

0:19 – Seriously though, please be careful when you are up that high or you might fall off. Oops.

0:21 – “This is an individual game. This is not a team game.” – Johnny Bananas. The Challenge does not really begin until the legendary Johnny Bananas has a say. Although maybe not of the poetic permanence of Johnny’s “All’s fair in love, war, and Challenges” from last season, the profound simplicity of his two sentences stands out. The subtext: “It is every man and woman for his or herself and I plan to win. This time I am playing only for Johnny.” Welcome back, Johnny. The Challenge is what it is today because of you and will not be the same when you finally hang up your oversized bandana. (One additional note: congrats to reigning champ and recent Challenge retiree Paula who is recently engaged and having a baby).

0:22 – Camila shows the new elimination format twist (TJ Lavin the Great loves a good twist!) confirmed in today’s BuzzFeed article: one person in the elimination round will be chosen by the winner of the challenge, but the other person will be chosen by a random drawing. If you want to be safe, you have to win.

0:24-0:28 – Aneesa, Devyn, and Jonna cannot believe their eyes. Chet lets us know that he is “going to fight for every inch.” The elimination arena does not seem like the happiest of places.

0:30 – “Romance” is in the air (after this disastrous season of The Bachelor, I couldn’t be more ready)! Last season, Jordan had a momentous hookup with Sarah in a closet. This season, it appears he is smitten with Laurel. Beyond impeccable taste in women, Jordan is a legitimate threat to win this Challenge. In other Real World: Portland news, Johnny (as in Daisy Dog, Bridgewater, MA Johnny) continues to inexplicably kiss beautiful women (First Averey, now Nany).

0:32 – “I believe that hooking up in the game may have its advantages.” Jemmye knows what’s up. I would also argue that a Challenge without Knight has its advantages for the audience, for other’s pining to guard CT’s body, for those wishing to be treated with respect, and especially for Preston and Jemmye who can finally be out from under Knight’s disrespectful behavior for the first time.

0:33 – Wait, who is Dustin kissing?

0:35 – So, Nany likes to kiss…

0:37 – …and may be crying because of it. Poor thing. I am just glad Dustin is back as her “big brother” emotional support rock.

0:38 – “The only way to stay safe in this game is to win.” TJ Lavin the Great should know.

0:38 – Isaac has returned after a seven season hiatus. Always a little bit of a wildcard (as erratic behavior on his original Real World: Sydney season showcased), Mr. Stout and his fashion pioneering haircut will be an interesting addition to this group of mostly established Challenge competitors.

0:39 – This is some nice camera focus work highlighting this potential showdown between likely women’s favorite Laurel and Theresa (another breakout performer, especially in extracurricular nighttime activity, early on last season). In case you haven’t already realized, this cast is kind of stacked.

0:42 – Listen, Swifty is not the tallest of men, so he needs to elevate himself sometimes to get through a scrum. Also noteworthy in these images is the most substantive footage of Frank in the entire trailer. Is this an intentional slight? Is MTV that burned by his open, honest, and apparently contract-breaching Grantland interview that they have gone out of their way to edit him out here? Or, does the lack of footage indicate an early elimination? You can say many things about Frank, but one thing you must admit is that he has been GREAT for the last two seasons of The Challenge. Let us hope that this is all “much ado about nothing” conjecture.

0:43 – Um, who is this woman?

0:43 – I feel like Zach is often in a lot of pain.

0:44 – “It’s me vs. you and I love that.” And this Challenge commentator loves that you are back, Laurel. After three finals losses (the last of which was on the first Rivals too many seasons ago), Laurel deserves another shot to be the first person of a season to reach the proverbial Challenge mountain top. A few years removed, a few years wiser, but still the same exceptional athlete and beautiful presence, Laurel is the woman to beat.

0:47 – I think that canoes are meant to stay upright, but I could be wrong.

0:48 – Perhaps the most telling moment of the trailer comes around the forty eight second mark. Although a brief conversation, there is potentially so much here. Jordan: “I will send you home.” The Legendary Johnny Bananas: “I will end you, bro.” These two had some competitive clashes in Thailand last season on Rivals 2, but now that each individual has a degree of free agency, it could get even more interesting this season. Their battle for supremacy could be one of the central story lines of Free Agents.

0:51 – Yes! There will be snow on the final! There will be a midseason climate change! That’s what I’m talking about!

0:54 – Boom.

0:57 – …And on Thursday nights? Very interesting. The countdown to April 10 has officially begun.

Note: Culture Challenged will be covering The Challenge: Free Agents all season (I moved all my work from Bishop and Company). Stay tuned for preseason power rankings columns in the coming weeks.

The Challenge: Free Agents premieres April 10 at 10 p.m. on MTV.

"The Challenge", Television

THE CHALLENGE: RIVALS 2 – A Good Old-Fashioned Week 8 Recap

August 29, 2013 David Bloom Leave a comment

A letdown was inevitable. Last week’s scintillating episode of The Challenge: Rivals 2 packed as much of what makes this Fifth Major Professional American Sport professional into its one hour runtime, capped off by a Jungle battle for the ages between two teams of superior athletes. This week’s women elimination week episode begins with a similar “edge of your seat” momentum, but fizzles its way to a women elimination that was less than compelling.

Let’s begin from the top where our remaining competitors are living the Thailand nightlife dream to let off some endorphins after witnessing (or in Jordan and Marlon’s case, participating in) a most epic Jungle. Frank must have had an off-camera dance floor run-in with Jemmye because he is venting his verbal attack to Jonna, his real life friend and LA roommate, in a well-lit sitting area. Jemmye is on to Frank’s ways and wishes that Knight would lose his CT bodyguard post just for a minute to protect his old flame. Jemmye addresses this desire to Knight back at the house. Intoxication levels are high, which means that Knight is primed to take Jemmye’s request as an opportunity to do what he seems to do best, attempt to destroy her where it hurts the most (the pursuit of a new Challenge house hobby has eluded him thus far). Camila, a #teamsubtitles loyalist and at present a blood alcohol level risk taker, comes to the defense of her Rival partner. Knight, to the surprise of no one, sits in his “I didn’t do the deed” state of innocence, as Camila inches closer to the brink of her (as we saw one night on Battle of the Seasons) state of intoxicated insanity.

We all have our people who can really get to us. For Jemmye it is Knight, and for Camila, it will always be Johnny Bananas. Amidst a huddle of bro standing, Johnny says something to the effect of “she’s crazy, dude” as only Johnny can do. Camila’s volcano of uncontrollable rage and violence literally erupts, but unlike Frank’s similar quick trigger from last week, Camila’s lava flow is just a bit messier. Paula, Jemmye, and especially Emily, become team “help Camila simmer down.” Camila kicks, screams, flails, and RAGES a monstrosity of animus toward Johnny. If not for Emily’s Herculean efforts of restraint, Camila would have attempted to make Johnny a human bobble-head. Jemmye’s moral of the story to Camila when active raging has ceased, “we can only trust ourselves.” #Teamsubtitles is learning to understand one another.

All is well again on challenge day (alcohol’s role in extracurricular nighttime activities must not go unnoticed) and TJ is ready to present this week’s fun scenario involving competitors falling from great heights into water, production’s weekly go to (Hmm, would it be possible to try something different more often? Last week’s Blind Leading the Blind shock-a-thon was awesome!). This week it is Swingers, a challenge that begins with an impossible trapeze artist attempt followed by an endless swim through a nasty current (of the water kind, unlike the electrical kind from last week). Cooke and Cara Maria are inevitably chosen to go first (Diem and Aneesa do not let them catch a break in the order – has their every been a team who was more consistently lower in the totem pole over the course of a Challenge season who has stayed this long as Cooke and Cara? I think not.). Despite Cooke’s incredible trapeze artistry, this challenge is really about the swim, and, apparently, Cara can’t. Current or no current, Cooke spends the near twenty minutes of participation motivating her partner to breath and fight through the panic. It is admittedly hard to watch Cara, self-effacing to a fault, struggle through an activity that is not in her stable of tricks. They do finish (the journey to the final buoy seemed to take up an entire segment of the show between commercials), but without another women team disqualification, a trip back to the Jungle for Cooke and Cara seems to be near certain.

Two men teams, ignoring the $1000 reward, logic, or the potential repercussions next week, voluntarily tap out. Although Knight already had finished, Preston is unfortunately swimming in the wrong direction (at least he is a great runner, right Knight?). In a more surprising turn, rookie sensation Marlon gives in to the current (much to Jordan’s competitive juiced chagrin) and DQs as well.

Frontrunner teams have similar successes – Frank and Paula are beasts in the open ocean. Both Johnny and Emily have more difficulty than their superstar partners, but compared to Preston and Cara, they look more like Ryan Lochte and Missy Franklin than Little John from Robinhood: Prince of Thieves. CT and Wes, sneakily under the radar as a serious contender this season, swim to the best male team time. Nany and Jonna compete, but both Aneesa and Diem and Jemmye and Camila excel (Who knew the #teamsubtitles catastrophe duo from the night before were trained lifeguards?). In a mere five-seconds better than Aneesa and Diem, Jemmye and Camila win (my preseason prognosticating is proving to be accurate) and are safe from this second to last women Jungle. No surprise, Cara Maria and Cooke were the last place women team and now must make their claim to stay in the Jungle.

This week’s voting deliberation focus is squarely on Frank and Jonna’s relationship. We learn that they are LA roommates and that Frank was an instrumental support when Jonna broke up with Zach. Unfortunately, as the alliances are currently constituted, the two teams Frank would have voted for are either safe (Jemmye and Camila) or already in the Jungle (Cara and Cooke). He couldn’t possibly vote for Paula and Emily (expected from the Johnny bond) or Diem and Aneesa (unexpected, did CT and Johnny’s teams join forces after week 1 in a strategic game changer that the audience was not aware of?). Jonna’s potential hurt is not enough to dissuade Frank from what he feels is in his team’s best strategic interest. According to Diem, Jonna and Nany’s strategy has been too “wishy-washy” anyway (whatever this means).

The 3-1 vote (Jordan and Marlon, trying to stick it to Johnny and Frank, vote for Paula and Emily) settles the Jonna and Nany versus Cooke and Cara Maria Jungle battle. This week’s game is Snapper, the one where Knight and Preston’s swordplay and verbal strategy (who can forget “Nola! Nola!”) eliminated Derek and Robb so many weeks ago. Like most Jungle games, Snapper is determined by winning 2 out of 3 (could we at least go 3 out of 5 next season, please?). Cooke beats Nany in the first heat because Cara’s directional code words are louder than anything Jonna says (maybe she is perplexed by Frank’s decision to wear her shorts with her name on it on his head in a show of solidarity. Where was his solidarity in the vote?). The second heat is as undramatic as the first. Cara beats Jonna (cameras don’t capture these thin wooden swords too well in HD) and Jonna and Nany are eliminated, just like that (strangely unremarkable second season for Nany after such a promising rookie campaign in Battle of the Seasons.).

After last week’s Jungle elimination for the ages, the letdown this week is real. Moving on…

There are now four men teams and four women teams left and one more elimination for each gender. Next week proves to be the much anticipated physical altercation between Johnny and his actual rivals, CT and Wes and the much anticipated goodbye to Preston and Knight (or so I predict). Stay tuned for a new power rankings before the episode next week…

David J. Bloom can be reached on twitter @davidbloom7 and writes about MTV’s “The Challenge,” pop culture, and the NBA for Bishop and Company. His “The Challenge: Rivals 2″ power rankings will post weekly starting on July 10.

"The Challenge", Television

RIVALS 2 Season Premiere Retro Running Diary

July 11, 2013 David Bloom 2 Comments

Opening night of the fifth American major professional sport (a “Challengoliday” as coined by the Czar himself, Dave Jacoby), dictates some special treatment, so a retro running diary of the festivities was the best possible way to encapsulate the greatness that was. I have decided to split up the retro diary from the new week 1 power rankings (to be released later in the week) in order to have more time to consider the game implications of what I just witnessed. Without further ado, on to the episode and welcome to the new season!

10:00 – And so we begin…This season The Challenge drops with a dramatic montage of clips from the past, teasers for future episodes, and some beautiful aerial shots of the green jungles of Phuket, Thailand. Not included in the clips montage: past clips from Ruins, the last time The Challenge ventured to Phuket, and the backdrop for this unfortunate chapter in Challenge history. It is like setting the 1968 Democratic National Convention in Dealey Plaza in Dallas. Something just doesn’t feel right. Random additional note: I did not expect to be making mediocre allusions to the JFK assassination in the first point of this running diary. As Bananas says, “All is fair in love and war and Challenges.”

10:01 – Welcome to the Jungle! When Naomi says it looks like “Nightmare on Elm Street” it begs the question, does Naomi know what “Nightmare on Elm Street” is?

10:01 – “Welcome everybody to Phuket, Thailand. My name is TJ Lavin. I am a pro BMX dirt jumper, and I am your host for The Challenge.” They must have edited out the part where he tells them that he is a “hero among men” and he essentially spends his life “killing it.”

10:02 – TJ describes the rivals conceit. According to TJ, the reasons for rivalry are: fighting, backstabbing, beating someone in a challenge, or…”dogg[ing] each other out in social media.” Yikes. I guess this is a thing now.

10:03 – TJ reveals the rivals and the only pair that seems to have any real hatred toward one another are Zach and Trey, or as Zach calls him, “Mighty Mouse.” Zach “despises this kid” and thinks Trey is “truly a disgusting human being.” Did I just miss this on Battle of the Seasons?

10:04 – Jess calls her pairing with Anastasia “like Team Barbie…stop…lipstick break.” I call their pairing “early elimination.”

10:04 – Derek, upon the reveal of Robb as his partner, thanks God that “his fight (on Battle of the Seasons) was with one of the biggest guys in the competition.” The Challenge: a place where it may be advisable in the long run to fight with someone twice your size.

10:05 – Paula crosses her fingers in hopes that Emily will be her partner. It doesn’t hurt to have a “lost X-Man” on your team. Leroy calls Ty “crazy” because “he is crazy.”

10:06 – Cooke brings “a lot of strengths to The Challenge being a division I athlete.” Would she have as many strengths coming from a D3 NESCAC school?

10:06 – Next up: Preston, who has the combination of a look of a man who would like to be anywhere but Phuket and a French painter. He acknowledges that having to depend on Knight “to get through these challenges is the worst thing possible.” Knight describes Preston’s biggest strength as his “toenail polish.” Team New Orleans 2.0!

10:07 – There is a depressed look on Dunbar’s face when he realizes Tyrie will be his partner. “He’s one of the worst players in the game,” Dunbar says. It reminds me of the look on Mike Dunleavy’s face when he was told that he would be partnered with Billy “The Whopper” Paultz in the 1981 Houston Rockets best looking teammate competition (The last bit I just made up…my hypothetical scenarios are a little bit of a struggle this early in the season.)

10:08 – Frank and Johnny are partnered because they had a “serious beef on twitter.” Frank acknowledges “that was an expensive fucking tweet.”

10:09 – TJ describes the game format (it could not be any simpler) like he is addressing a group of seven year-olds. Their eyes light up when TJ floats intel on a total potential winnings pot of $350,000 ($125,000 for each winning gender team, $35,000 for second place, $15,000 for third).

10:10 – TJ tells us that “there might be a couple of surprises, so be prepared.” Message received, TJ. Message received.

10:11 – We venture into a house that makes Marlon think he is on a show like “lifestyles of the rich and famous.” (“I’m Robin Leach, I’m yelling, and I don’t know why!”) CT, fighting off his own sweat in the Thai nighttime heat, promptly gives rookies Jess and Anastasia the following ground rules: Rule 1. No pooping. Rule 2. No open door policy. Rule 3. No food, no bugs, no problems. CT – it is a pleasure to have you back.

10:12 – As the “nighttime extracurricular activities” begin, Trey and Zach have a heart to heart in the pool where they both talk about how wonderful they are as athletes (no dispute from me). Early strategy talks like this are good sign for this team of mutual hatred. My wildcard pick for them to make the finals is so far so good.

10:13 – Marlon trips and accidentally breaks a glass that falls in the pool. CT immediately responds by creating Rule 4. If glass gets in the pool, we can’t go in the pool no more. Glass in the pool make CT very angry…

10:14 – …enough to begin a water fight to the throat with Marlon. Please cut to commercial!

10:16 – And we’re back! Jordan realizes that he better go prevent his partner from getting into any more trouble and CT dismisses his head in the water. After sixteen minutes, CT is earning his paycheck.

10:17 – Leroy (no surprise here from this classy dude) helps cool CT down. “What do you like more – money or some bullshit, bro?” CT responds to Leroy with, “When it comes down to it, I love you man.” The Challenge is back! Some major takeaways from the fight: Marlon is a tougher guy than I ever knew. CT is huge person and gets off on relentless intimidation, but Marlon is fearless and would not back down in the pool scrum. Both Jordan (go to defend) and Wes (let this CT iteration be alone) knew how to handle their respective partner situation. Will Wes’s laissez-faire attitude toward CT wildfires come back to haunt him?

10:17 – In other news, to the amusement of many a passerby (and clearly to the fancy of the MTV editing room), Tyrie is passed out and naked on the toilet with the door open. Way to buck your own personal trend of disappointing Challenges, Tyrie. There are reasons why some competitors are successful and some competitors are not. This is just not a good look from Tyrie.

10:18 – It only took eighteen minutes into the episode to have our first revisit of the Diem and CT classic love story. It is possible I have now read this book too many times now. On a more sincere note, Diem’s fight against ovarian cancer is simply incredible. Her courage and fortitude are an inspiration to us all.

10:19 – CT uses the old “take off that weave” trick, playing into Diem’s confidence (or lack thereof) without her wig. He has the majority of the audience of this show officially swooning.

10:21 – The Chet/Devyn soundbyte king and queen vacuum is real. Knight has announced his candidacy for the job: “I hope that this first challenge is nothing physical for Preston’s sake, while I also hope it’s nothing with sharks because I don’t fuck with sharks.”

10:21 – Preston give a self-assessment: “I’m smaller than all the other guys, I’m less athletic than all the other guys, but I can run like a gazelle, I can accessorize, and I have lavender hair.” The ability to accessorize will be of particular relevance. Poor, Knight.

10:22 – The challenge is called “Game of Inches.” One team member has to tangle from a rig over the water and the other team member jumps off a plank onto the teammate who must catch and hold them for fifteen-seconds. Whoever makes it, moves on to the next round. Each round, the plank moves further and further from the dangling teammate. Eliminations will alternate with each challenge and “Game of Inches” will be a guy’s elimination. If you are the winning team, you are safe from elimination. If you are the losing team, you go straight into the jungle.

10:34 – Emily and Paula beat Jonna and Nany to win the women’s heat of the first challenge. The frontrunners have made a statement indeed.

10:37 – The guys rounds appear to be a perfect way to have rivals hug out some of their differences, or in CT’s case, to inflict further pain on Wes.

10:38 – Dunbar and Tyrie (no surprise here) are the first men’s team eliminated and will find themselves in the first jungle elimination. Dunbar continues to look like he is about to cry; he is so disappointed to be partnered with Tyrie.

10:44 – Trey and Zach hold on to an impressive win. Johnny’s take speaks for itself: “Trey, the little elf, managed to jump into the arms of the jolly green giant and now we are going to have listen to these two idiots talk more about themselves.”

10:50 – CT begins to talk some voting strategy with Leroy on the bus back to the house. His target: Johnny Bananas because CT “hopes to win one of these one of these days” and Johnny’s mob tactics in the past (as he used according to CT on Rivals) will be an obstruction to this said aspiration. The idea of Johnny Bananas running this local syndicate feels oddly appropriate. I could see him fitting into the world of Boardwalk Empire with relative ease.

10:50 – Tyrie, in a brief fit of obvious wisdom, “Johnny Bananas has become almost synonymous with the word The Challenge.” Go on, Tyrie. “I don’t have anything to lose if I lose to Johnny and Frank, but if I win, the whole scope of the game changes, so we might as well call out the king.” You might as well, Tyrie, go against the strongest team in this game. I guess when your reputation and track record are that bad, why not give yourself a lesser chance to survive?

10:51 – The most underrated part of the strategy scrambling pre-public villa vote is the role Wes takes: quiet bystander. After a very early exit on Battle of the Seasons and some strong lingering anti-Wes sentiment still pervasive in many of the competitors, his conscious choice to keep a lower profile is a sound strategy. For Wes, it is unfortunate that CT took the opposite approach by attempting to be at the center of every battle or conversation. For now, Wes is doing exactly what he needs to do.

10:54 – It’s public vote time and the women are up first. Here is how it goes down:

Emily and Paula vote Derek and Robb because “they haven’t really had any conversations with this team at all.” Anastasia (“I like you guys, but…”) and Jess vote Derek and Robb as well. Jonna and Nany (“…are not voting for Derek and Robb”) vote for Preston and Knight. Camila (“I like you guys, but right now, there is really no loyalty between us…”) and Jemmye vote for Robb and Derek. Cooke and Naomi vote Jordan and Marlon “just because.” Sarah (“Although we love them…”) and Trishelle vote Derek and Robb. Jasmine (“It’s nothing personal, but the rookies as well…”) and Theresa vote Marlon and Jordan. Diem and Aneesa vote Derek and Robb because they have also not “had any real conversations yet.” The final vote tally is 5 for Derek and Robb, 2 for Jordan and Marlon, and 1 for Knight and Preston.

10:55 – TJ delivers one of those aforementioned surprises. Be prepared: “Derek and Robb, if it was up to the girls, you would be going to the Jungle, and well, guess what you guys, it is up to the girls.” As Sarah sound bytes, “This changes everything.” The girls will be deciding for the guys and the guys will be deciding for the girls.

11:00 – Tyrie speaks some indiscernible words to Marlon about beating Robb and Derek in the Jungle. The. Writing. Is. On. The. Wall.

11:01 – Johnny and CT have a little public dispute that centers mostly on past Challenges and the sanctity of tactics used. Johnny calls CT “Chris” which is like an angry mom using a child’s full name when sending him to his room without supper. Frank thinks that now that CT has fired shots, he and Johnny should not really worry too much about another coup attempt. Frank thinks that we should “let him shake…LET HIM SHAKE!”

11:01 – Go Wes! He comes up with the idea to turn the living room and kitchen into a fake nightclub and group buy-in seems to be all in with this idea. So far, Wes has stayed out of CT troubles and contributed in a big way to the social world of a Challenge house. I am digging this Wes version 2.0.

11:03 – After a night of constant flirting, Ana and CT end up being caught much more than making out by a surveillance cam. Jessica just goes for it: “Anastasia trying to sleep with CT isn’t going to end well. Anastasia is emotional and I just don’t want her to get attached because if she does, it’s gonna be a bad day in a Challenge for her and I.”

11:09 – Poor Naomi must go home because her estranged dad is having some serious heart problems. This harrowing chapter for her (can you imagine just how long that plane fight must feel from Phuket to NYC?) may ultimately create a bond between Naomi and Cooke, so there’s that silver lining. Other weird irony: one cast member from Real World: Las Vegas has now gone home after one week of competition on each Rivals. Mikey replaced Adam the first time. Will we see Heather replace Naomi this time?

11:10 – “Welcome to the Jungle…” The challenge between Robb and Derek and Tyrie and Dunbar is called “Last Chance” and it involves running through each other to ring a bell first. The first team to ring the bell twice stays another week.

11:17 – In the first round, Derek manages to run by the larger frames of Dunbar and Tyrie with Robb setting a nasty screen.

11:23 – The second round is a photo finish and by a tenth of a second, Robb and Derek ring the bell first (poor Dunbar missed it on the first swing. Luck was not his friend this season).

11:23 – Robb and Derek are very happy to be coming back and might celebrate, according to Robb, by cuddling together tonight.

11:23 – Tyrie doesn’t really have a thing to say and Dunbar is just really pissed off. I am not sure I have seen a more depressing losing team ever on The Challenge and this is likely to be, after six very unsuccessful seasons, Tyrie’s last.

11:25 – Everyone celebrates and loves life in a Thai nightclub that seems more like a sweat lodge.

11:26 – Johnny pokes at Anastasia about her pursuit of CT. Ana’s response, “I am single and I’m having fun.” According to the slap heard round the modern The Challenge world in the trailer, this will not last too long.

FINALLY, on the full “THIS SEASON ON” (identical to the Zapruder Analyzed Trailer) this is what I saw:

CT maniacally laughing
Jonna not having Leroy’s back
Sarah knows that “at the heart of all of us are good people” (go her!)
Trey knows that “they are way more nervous and way more scared than we could ever possibly be”
Romantic connections between Jemmye and Marlon, Jordan and Sarah, Nany and CT, Leroy and Theresa
Aneesa thinks that Trishelle is “always going to be trash”
A camera gets in Zach’s face
Camila’s finger gets in Theresa’s face
Jonna and Jordan approach a romantic kiss
Johnny declares, “All is fair in love, war, and challenges”
Paula “doesn’t care who we piss off.”
and finally, TJ welcomes everyone to the “scariest elimination round we have ever had” that seems to feature an electric chair

Stay tuned for the week 1 individual and team power rankings to be released later this week. Until then, spread the good word.

"The Challenge", Blog Posts, Television

THE CHALLENGE: RIVALS 2 Team Previews – Jonna and Nany

July 5, 2013 David Bloom 5 Comments

This is the sixth in a series of “The Challenge: Rivals 2″ team previews that will lead into the first power rankings of the season. Next up: Paula and Emily

JONNA and NANY

Where did we last see them? Jonna and Nany were last seen habitually near the top of the weekly power rankings for Battle of the Seasons, although both just missed out on an opportunity to compete in the finals.

The Rivalry: Honest confession – I think this rivalry amounts to a whole lot of nothing. Jonna and Nany were a close pair before Battle of the Seasons, but then a Jonna Turkish love affair with Zach and some alliance tension created a division between these two onetime friends that came to a climax in and around the reunion.

Rivalry Meter on a scale of 1-10 (where 1 is a Leroy and Mike from Rivals I “Rivalry? They’re actually really good friends” rivalry and 10 is a Kenny and Wes from Rivals I “they have hated each other for years” RIVALRY) – 3, best Rivals I comparison: Johnny and Tyler

Highlights and Commentary from MTV bio:

“Jonna explains, ‘I should have stood up for Nany, but instead I chose a guy over a friend and that’s the number one rule you don’t break.’”

Although I think there may be more important rules not to break (traveling in basketball, stealing), preseason buzz on this pair is that the reasons behind the tension (Jonna’s very much over relationship with Zach) appear to be behind them.

“Nany is a strong, athletic presence in the game but her quick temper has been her undoing in the past, while Jonna’s need for male attention fueled their rivalry in the first place.”

There is much to agree with here. Nany’s “strong, athletic presence” was a highlight of Battle of the Seasons. I think her quick temper continues to be something to monitor, but I was more impressed with how she seemed to be able to effectively recover from those moments she would like to forget. Also of note – her bond with Dustin and consummate loyalty to Team Las Vegas was a key to her success last season. She will be able to attain that focus with Jonna as a partner. Jonna’s need for male attention may have “fueled their rivalry in the first place,” but I think she has learned her lesson and will benefit from a two person partnership as opposed to a series of team alliances.

“Although she claims to be solely focused on the game, Jonna could ruin Nany’s plans when she cozies up to a hot new boy-toy.”

This could happen, but my money is on Jonna and Nany having a shot to win it in the finals.

Best-Case Scenario: All of this “rivalry” talk is rendered silly and Jonna and Nany become an irrepressible force in Rivals 2 with a trip to the finals and a legitimate shot to win.

Worst-Case Scenario: Out of the mutual protective shield of surrogate sibling Dustin Zito, some of the stronger male personalities (Knight again, CT, Frank) find those right Nany buttons to push and she struggles with the pressure. Jonna will be loyal and supportive, but no Dustin in Nany’s world (or on this season) is a big loss.

The Verdict: Many of the pairings in this game seem to make little sense in that they are either stretching the definition of what it means to be a “rival” (most cases) or not a pairing that anyone was hoping to see compete in this game (Cooke and Naomi?). Jonna and Nany, although not necessarily “rivals” in a true sense, are a tandem, especially considering their exceptional showing on Battle of the Seasons, that we are looking forward to watching compete. They have a ripe combination of game strategy and challenge athleticism that will be a worthy match to some of their strongest opponents. I would be surprised if they do not got far this season.

Watch the Jonna and Nany pre-interviews here.

Other team previews:

Anastasia and Jessica

David J. Bloom can be reached on twitter @davidbloom7 and writes about MTV’s “The Challenge,” pop culture, and the NBA for Bishop and Company. His weekly “The Challenge: Rivals 2” power rankings will begin the week of July 10.

"The Challenge", Blog Posts, Television

THE CHALLENGE: BATTLE OF THE SEASONS Penultimate Retro Running Diary

December 14, 2012 David Bloom 2 Comments

The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons remaining competitors are literally on the verge of jumping out of a plane into the Namib desert to embark on a final challenge that even TJ thinks is undoable. In order to best encapsulate the awesome and incredible season this has been, I have decided to split up the column this week. First, is the retro running diary of the penultimate and final elimination episode. Early next week, I will release my pre-final power rankings and some further analysis of the remaining teams and their chances in the Namib Desert experience. Here we go…

THE WEEK 11 Penultimate RETRO RUNNING DIARY (power rankings to follow in a separate column)

The times are EST on the night the original episode aired, so feel free to follow along while viewing for the first time or while re-watching.

10:01 – There is one more challenge left and our faithful competitors are off to Namibia, Africa (“The homeland!” as coined by Devyn) for the rest of the season. Dustin: “Well there’s no tigers. Is there tigers? I don’t know.”

10:02 – 3o hours later, we arrive in Namibia…The edit shows us Survivor-esque shots of dangerous looking (beetles, snakes) animals, less dangerous looking (ostriches, gazelles) animals, and the dune-rich sandy deserts of a Tatooine-like landscape. Will our remaining teams be roughing it out in the African wilderness? Not this time. MTV splurged for an Atlantic Ocean side beach three-story that appears to have been transplanted from a Santa Barbara villa. There is African fused urban chic decorum! There is an indoor pool! There is enough alcohol to last a Frank evening! Trishelle: “We are in Africa!” Cue the third single from Alanis Morrisette’s Jagged Little Pill album…

10:03 – Sarah sets the stage for the final challenge with an experienced command that only she has: “This is the most important challenge yet. There are only four teams left: Vegas, who everybody is thinking is going to lose this challenge, San Diego, the clearly strong team, Cancun, who is shacking up with clearly the strongest team here, and Brooklyn. There’s no way we won’t be going in if we don’t win.” There it is.

10:03 – At the challenge, Sam sees an ATV and a ramp going into the water and all she can think of is Steve-O and Jackass. This concerns me on so many levels.

10:03 – TJ: “Today’s challenge is called ‘Sling Shot’.” Team San Diego starts laughing uncontrollably upon hearing the pun heavy title. Maybe I am obtuse for not getting it, but why is this so funny?

10:04 – “Sling Shot,” according to TJ, borrows a little “technique from the rednecks.” Ignorance?

10:05 – TJ explains the challenge (some ATV driving, a human sling shot into the water, lots of swimming to a dock, ring the bell, more swimming back to shore to cross the finish line) and the enhanced stakes (“You don’t want to go home now.”) Two people participate at a time, so the average time of the Brooklyn and San Diego’s respective two heats will be the counted score. This could be a distinctive advantage (if they do well) or disadvantage (if they do poorly) to the two person teams.

10:05 – TJ: “Today’s challenge has a little bit more riding on it today.” Devyn: “Literally.” Boom!

10:05 – Brooklyn is confident pre-challenge. Sarah, to her team: “You are a swimmer (to JD) and I am a swimmer. And you guys are the drivers. (To Devyn) You don’t even have to get your hair wet.” This is followed by a high-five and reason number 731 that Team Brooklyn has been a joy and a revelation to watch this season.

10:06 – Dustin and Trishelle have some pre-game confidence acknowledging (by a proud hand raise) that they fit right in with an event that connects to the redneck experience. Dustin: “That would be me!”

10:06 – Team Vegas is first (as chosen by San Diego’s power team privilege) and the Dustin ramp launch is teased into a commercial break…

10:09 – It’s Sway, introducing some end of the year TV event. I am distracted by the following notions: the fact that Sway is still around, how Sway got to appear on TV in the first place, whether or not Sway has any colleagues left at MTV News, whether MTV News still exists, why Gideon Yago is not a bigger star, why John Norris dyed his hair blonde during the mid-90s, how MTV used to be about music, and how The Real World and The Challenge longevity is one of the most underrated and unheralded TV stories (why aren’t more people talking about this?). Back to Sway – I am probably not going to spend my New Year’s with you. Sorry, buddy.

10:10 – Dustin “I feel like a superhero right now” Zito literally flies into the water (“I feel like I am here to save the day.”) off the ramp. Dustin absolutely kills the swimming portion of the challenge (TJ: “Way to dig deep”) and Team San Diego looks nervous. Dustin’s post performance vomiting (a longer swim than anyone thought) does not quell the fears of the other teams.

10:12 – Next up: Sarah and Chet for Brooklyn. Sarah battles with the deceptively cold water, bests a minor dock elevation misstep, and swims her heart out to the shore line as her teammates (in the truest sense of the word) cheer her on. Like Dustin before her, vomiting and artificial oxygen support are necessary (“We are in Africa!”).

10:13 – The JD/Devyn tandem seem to have the same success. JD’s (“This is fun!”) dolphin training experience is yet again a difference maker in this game.

10:15 – Derek struggles with the swimming (“I can’t breathe”) and is forced to backstroke much of the return trip to the shore. Things do not look good form Team Cancun.

10:16 – Ashley’s ATV stalls and Frank’s ramp acceleration flops like your average play from Reggie Evans. He has to swim longer than anyone else before him and although he does maintain a steady pace throughout, was it fast enough?

10:17 – Zach (“the last time I swam competitively was never”) owns his heat and competition in general. This guy was made for The Challenge.

10:18 – Team Cancun is the losing team (no surprise there) and will be forced into the final arena and Team Vegas is the winning team (the Vegas comeback is on!). TJ puts it in historical perspective: “Very rarely is a team get picked to go first and then win.” Dustin sees this late challenge adversity as “the best preparation for the final.” He may be right.

10:23 – Dustin and Trishelle must instantaneously deliberate (an appreciated African twist) and choose Team San Diego to go into the arena.

10:24 – TJ: “So which game are they going to play?” Trishelle: “Do we have a second to talk about it, or…?” TJ: “I mean, you got a second.” TJ Lavin – this is what host greatness is all about. (BTW – Dustin chooses “strategy” as means of leveling the playing field for Cancun while making San Diego “sweat.”)

10:25 – Chet gets the poetic drama of the final arena battle: “Jonna has been boning her way to the final and now Zach’s team has to go against her. I mean could you ask for a better final elimination?” There will be a serious depreciation of life quality without the man, the myth, the legend that is Chet on my television once a week.

10:25 – Dinner is served (on three, four-person tables – an odd configuration) and Sam is publicly basking in the glow of Frank’s ramp elevation issues in the challenge (completely the ATV or Ashley’s, the ATV driver, fault). Frank vents his frustration to Ashley in the nastiest of terms (as only Frank can). Poor Jasmine’s low weight is dragged into the mess. Is this a potential team turmoil fueled harbinger for what is yet to come for Team San Diego? (The seating chart, by the way: Zach, Jonna, Sam, and Dustin are at one table. Trishelle, Devyn, Sarah, and Chet are at another table. The third table is Derek, JD, Ashley, and Frank. So much incredible interpersonal and social structure understanding can be gleaned from this configuration. I am fascinated.)

10:30 – Even though Sarah is off of arena duty and has a ticket to the finals, her strategic game is at play: “As much as I loathe (gulp, unexpected) conversation with her, I give Jonna advice on how to do the strategy one, hoping that maybe she can send San Diego home. It would mean Brooklyn would be the only four person team running in the final, and maybe we could win the whole thing.”

10:31 – Understatement of the episode alert from Ashley: “Nothing is every easy for Team San Diego.” Doubts about the arena abound. Frank feels like he is going to puke.

10:32 – The “Knot So Fast” arena strategy game is transported to Africa. It is the same rules and concept as in Turkey’s fire pit locale, but the large metallic domes have been replaced by wooden teepees. Production must have run out of resources or money after decorating the Namibian digs.

10:35 – Round 1 (the rope twisting part) is over. San Diego and Cancun both feel good about what they did. The viewer struggles (knot so great translation to television) to have any idea about just happened.

10:37 – Round 2 (the rope untwisting part) begins and it looks like (from this obstructed view vantage point) that Cancun is neck and neck with Frank and Ashley. The entirety of Brooklyn and Vegas are instructing Jonna and Derek’s every move. Yes, Chet. The Cancun v. San Diego final elimination was a perfect ending, but another arena battle (more understandable suspense) may have yielded more tangible evidence to support this claim.

10:40 – During the commercial break, a The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 television promo tries to make the connection between “holiday season” and this final installment of the popular movie franchise (a reach like Robb’s arms). I try to keep myself in the center of pop culture, but this Edward/Jacob/Bella journey is one that I am glad I have never partaken in.

10:41 – Frank and Ashley make an “oopsy” in their rope untangling, or as I like to call it, the night in San Diego that Nate and Priscilla “hooked up.” This was the most lenient possible interpretation of the word “exes” in human history.

10:41 – Jonna struggles with all the side-coaching and instead of tuning them out, decides to engage and yell back (“just shut up!”). Derek recognizes the problem with this reaction.

10:42 – Ashley and Frank win and Jonna is still focused on the “too many voices” that affected her performance. Thankfully, Zach is their to comfort her. Jonna intimates that she was in the “worst place of her entire life” before coming on The Challenge (that poor guy she dumped on the phone from the season premiere must be struggling with this revelation) and that Zach has been the best thing that has happened to her. Underrated subplot of the season: how functional Zach and Ashley seem to be with their post-breakup existence. San Diego had to overcome much diversity to get to the final and I am not sure they could have sustained another interpersonal impasse. Credit to both Ashley and Zach on this front.

10:43 – Frank and Ashley “love each other” and are as bonded as any two people on this season. This is yet another aspect of the Jekyll & Hyde Team San Diego experience.

10:44 – Derek and Jonna walk off into the Namibian desert horizon. We are down to the final three teams. TJ sets the scene while addressing Teams Brooklyn, Vegas, and San Diego: “You are officially in the final. I hope you guys dig a little bit deeper. I’ve been on over a hundred challenges. I don’t think anybody can finish that final, but if you can, you are getting $250,000 for first place. See you at the finals. Congratulations.” He follows this by rocking a cool hand signal gesture. There is only one TJ Lavin.

10:46 – The cast finds a new wardrobe for the finals (including under armor full body suits and new sneakers) waiting for them at Camp Namibia. Dustin models the new gear. The “night before” excitement is real.

10:46 – Chet and Trishelle have a heart to heart about the finals makeup of Team Brooklyn (particularly the potential liability of Devyn). Chet is in beast mode and will “carry Devyn up a hill across an ocean” if he must. This why Chet is rightfully ranked number 1 in the rankings.

10:46 – Chet’s interview analysis takes the clear plot forecasting a step further: “I have the endurance of a young virgin cult. I could win this thing by myself if I were allowed to, but Devyn thinks that taking the spoon from a peanut butter jar to her mouth constitutes a workout.” Well, there’s that.

10:47 – Trishelle has some legitimate (the episode two weeks ago warrants this feeling) concerns about her ability to work with Dustin in a stressful, competitive environment. There are now doubts percolating around each team. This is real.

10:51 – The morning of the final is here! The “butterflies are doing their thing” in Dustin’s stomach. According to Sarah, JD is “looking good.” Zach has a “pit in his stomach the size of a bowling ball.” Devyn puts on her weave. Now it is time.

10:52 – Sarah reminds us that the last time she was in a final, she “got heatstroke and ended up in the back of an ambulance.” She also lets us know that she is “not going to do that this time,” that she “came here to win,” and that she is “never giving up.” Competition, be warned. Sarah has her game face on and is ready to dominate.

10:53 – TJ, in front of three helicopters and four planes, breaks down the potential earning situation: first place is $250,000, second place is $60,000, and third place is $40,000. Everyone is at least winning $10,000 and Dustin and Trishelle could walk away with $125,000 if Team Vegas wins.

10:53 – TJ: “Welcome to the vast and empty Namib desert. You are officially entering no-man’s land. There is only one way in. So to start things off, you guys are going to be jumping out of those (pointing to the planes).” That’s what I’m talking about, The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons! You are killing it!

10:57 – Trishelle thinks Dustin give her the look of “I will rip your head off you back out of this.” I think it was more of the look of “this is the coolest thing I have ever done.” Just sayin…

10:57 – TJ’s inspirational wisdom: “This is going to be the hardest thing you have ever done in your entire lives. You will be a better person for finishing this thing. So, no matter what happens…when you are going, and you feel like you can’t go anymore, just ask yourself is that your mind speaking or your body. Ninety percent of the time, it’s your mind. So just tell it, no I am cool. Just keep on moving. Good luck. I will see you soon. Make it happen.”

10:58 – Ashley has an amazing way of making every post production interview feel super happy and cute, even when she is talking about jumping out of planes.

10:59 – The ominous music says, “there is a storm coming.” Well-played, sound designer. Well-played.

10:59 – Dustin’s jump (the one originally teased in the pre-season trailer) leads into a “to be continued” fade to black screen…next week is The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons final challenge and I could not be more ready…

Stay tuned for my pre-final power rankings and my analysis and predictions of how well Teams Brooklyn, San Diego, and Las Vegas will fare in the finals (out sometime on Monday). Then, tune in Wednesday at 10 PM on MTV for the final episode of The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons.

David Bloom can be reached on twitter at @davidbloom7. His CHALLENGE POWER RANKINGS come out weekly on Derek Kosinski’s UltimateChallengeRadio.com. The Week 12 power rankings will be available sometime before the final.

"The Challenge", Television

THE CHALLENGE: BATTLE OF THE SEASONS WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS – WEEK 9

November 19, 2012 David Bloom Leave a comment

I was going to save my first The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons running diary for a season finale recap (epic, groundbreaking, and one of a kind athletic competitions demand such attention), but this week’s episode arena battle between Team Cancun’s CJ and Team San Diego’s Zach (both one-time NFL aspiring uber-athletes) was so phenomenal (and according Sarah on twitter: “that elimination between @ZachMTV & @CJKoegelMTV was a MILLION times more intense in real life vs how it looked on TV”) that a running retro diary is the only way to appropriately depict the glory in prose. If you re-watch or have not watched yet, I am indicating the time on the EST telecast that each moment went down if you want to follow along.

Let the games begin!

10:00 – The opening recap reminds us of Jonna’s season premiere phone dumping of her GBH (Guy Back Home). GBH – in case you wanted to be reminded of this humiliation on national television again, MTV has got you covered.

10:00 – Reminders of last week’s Frank and Zach team implosion feel even more uncomfortable in retrospect.

10:01 – What is Lacey doing in the opening credits? I think she was asked to raise her hand and make a “come and get it gesture.” It looks more like she is giving the finger with four fingers. Poor Lacey may not have been right for the Challenge.

10:02 – Zach informs us that his “only goal here is to make Frank’s life miserable.” Trishelle “swears to God” that she thinks Frank and Zach need therapy. I swear to God, this is a great idea.

10:02 – Jonna: “With Zach I think it is like a weird situation. It’s fantasyland. It’s Challengeland. This is The Challenge world. This isn’t real life.” Can this quotation be reinforced daily for Challenge competitors who take the interpersonal interplay on a Challenge a little too seriously. Who can we get on this?

10:03 – It seems like Jonna needs to be on the Challenge more than anyone else because she was blackmailed by an ex-boyfriend two years ago (who even stole her dog!). She does not want to be homeless ever again. This is a reasonable desire.

10:04 – Welcome to the “Hunger Games,” a “70s game show gone bad” according to Dustin. Things are not looking good (puke buckets?) until TJ enters in a vintage suit, sans cap, with slicked back hair and a Bob Barker micropohone. Killing it just found a entirely new level of excellence.

10:05 – TJ: “You guys are going to be having a good, old-fashioned eating contest!” Chet’s expression says, “I would rather stab myself in the eye with a machete.”

10:05 – The rules are a wee-bit complicated and teams seem as perplexed and bewildered as viewers when Shauvon popped an implant on The Ruins.

10:06 – Team San Diego cannot even help themselves. We are about to eat disgusting food, so let’s have another embarrassing talk about how much we don’t get along. Trishelle: “I love to sit back and watch San Diego sometimes. They just never ever stop fighting, these people. It is sort of like a television show, it’s great.” Preach, Trishelle. Zach does a spot-on impression of Frank.

10:06 – TJ’s assistant “Bunny” brings out the first item. In a comical turn from either TJ or some hysterical producer, “Bunny” will be called the following names over the course of the “Hunger Games” (I kid you not): Bambi, Diamond, Candy, Daisy, Chastity, Passion, Sapphire, Mercedes, Diamond, Cinnamon, Raquel

10:07 – TJ lets everyone know that when making a prediction of how many items a team can eat, we only round up. Thank you, he appreciates it, though.

10:08 – Team Cancun is challenged to eat fifty-one baklava (a palette cleanser according to Alton) in four minutes. MTV plays the song “Moderation” to underscore the moment.

10:09 – The horn sounds (literally freaking out Sarah and Chet) and Diamond determines that Team Cancun ate…Let’s go to a commercial.

10:11 – I am not going to lie. When a dude from Halo tells me to drink the Dew, I am going to drink the Dew.

10:13 – Back to the show, Team Cancun misses out on the fifty-one baklava threshold by two and has a one-way ticket to the loser’s round. Jonna is concerned that Jasmine didn’t “eat her share” and that it is a good thing that CJ and Derek are seated between them. Jonna – have you seen Jasmine? Her share may be a little smaller than yours.

10:13 – Marie crosses her fingers in hope of cheeseburgers. Girl, you are in the wrong reality inspiration (i.e. this is not Surivivor and very much Fear Factor) eating contest, although I love your innocent earnestness.

10:14 – Team Brooklyn must eat thirty-five grape leaves. Sarah (“I love grape leaves” and “don’t get scared about the amount that is on the plate”) is in “pump up her team” mode as always.

10:14 – Zach is turned on by the way Devyn is eating the strangely phallic grape leaves. He can’t even describe and we can’t even understand it.

10:14 – According to Sarah, Chet looks like he is “being polite at his grandmother’s kitchen table.” Sarah is in the zone. Nany gives her props, even if watching Sarah makes Nany want to vomit.

10:15 – Chet winks at Daisy and tells her she looks beautiful. JD almost loses his leaves, but holds strong. A Chastity announcement later, Brooklyn’s total grape leave consumption is at forty-seven. Sorry, Team San Diego – Loser’s round destination chosen.

10:16 – Team Las Vegas rocks some strategy and bets low on the hot chili plate, forcing Team St. Thomas to eat eighteen. TJ appreciates Sapphire’s plate delivery. Dustin appreciates Mr. Lavin (seriously killing it like no time before).

10:18 – Marie eats hot peppers in her sleep and pulls her Robb twosome to the winner’s round, eliminating Team Las Vegas (they are thrilled to have missed out on the Turkish cuisine) from the winner’s round.

10:18 – Diamond, without further ado, what do Brooklyn and St. Thomas have to eat as much of as they can in two minutes? Cow liver! TJ: “Just think of it as steak.”

10:19 – Marie, after her pepper eating clinic, cannot hold down the cow liver (really though, who can?) and for the first time in TV history, is “disqualified for vomiting.” Listen, in the scheme of disqualification reasons, vomiting is far superior to Big Easy’s way of “can’t climb the ladder.” Poor Marie does not get along with cow liver (JD seems to dig it).

10:20 – For the loser’s round, San Diego and Cancun must compete in a cow intestine/testicle eating battle. Ashley and Frank have a sexual innuendoed inside joke about going for the testicles. Stay classy, San Diego.

10:21 – During the commercial break, I like how Trojan Charged: Orgasmic Pleasure sponsors The Challenge: “charged moment of the week.” The selected moment was from last week’s episode in which Frank and Zach orally obliterate Sam as she struggles up the log jam hill. This bit of linkage to “orgasmic pleasure” is a bit of a stretch.

10:26 – Beyond Ashley, who seems primed to eat cow testicles all day, both San Diego and Cancun are STRUGGLING. Poetic justice for alliance bullying earlier in the game? The ravishing Raquel reveals that San Diego is the big loser (beyond the cow innards consumption) and has an arena date.

10:28 – A San Diego team pow-wow does not go so well. Zach walks off in disgust and Frank blows low with the “I fucking hate all three of you” routine. To their credit, Ashley and Sam are calm, seem sane, and, like the rest of us, don’t really know what to do with San Diego’s men.

10:28 – Back in the bedroom, Frank releases his frustration to Marie and Robb (credit to Team St. Thomas survivors for riding the Frank superstorm). In a fit that contradicts his words, Frank is “not going to be made to look like a fucking crazy person.”

10:29 – Devyn made a bet with her team that if they won two challenges in a row, she would take off her wig(s) and “rock an afro.” As TJ says, “Looking good.”

10:33 – Team Brooklyn sends Team Cancun in to the arena so they can experience “the love of” it. Devyn is brilliant.

10:34 – CJ holds a Team San Diego meeting and is ready to go in to the arena, but wants to go with Jonna, the strongest female player. Jonna reminds everyone that she may be homeless and storms out of the room. CJ’s endearing reaction: “Character is first and money should be second in this game.”

10:35 – Zach and Jonna have an emotional moment together about the realization that one of them could be going home. The song underscoring this moment? “Glorious” by Stephanie Mabey. Download it to have a good cry.

10:36 – On to the main arena event (earlier in the episode than ever before)! This is what we have been waiting for.

10:37 – Sam goes into the arena because Ashley may not be mean enough from this. If Sam comes back, she will get a rankings bump for winning her second straight arena, but Ashley may as well for characterizing “not being mean enough” as an asset in this competition.

10:40 – Jasmine steps up for Cancun, acknowledging her protective role as Jonna’s sister. No one has grown more than Jasmine on this challenge. Her days of wine glass toss with Tyrie and Johnny Bananas seem like decades ago.

10:40 – Frank, Professor of Hypocrisy 101: “Sam and Zach going in is the best thing for San Diego and I am just so happy that Zach knows how to man up when he has to.”

10:40 – In the understatement of the season, when learning of CJ’s arena involvement, TJ says, “Oh, this is going to be a good match.” You have no idea.

10:41 – For the first time since the season premiere when the Big Easy Stampede ran over Wes, the arena event is “Hall Brawl.”

10:41 – The audience chatter is all about Jonna. Sarah: “If Jonna sneaks by without ever having to see one of these Arenas…” Trishelle: “She’s the trashiest person I’ve ever met.” Devyn: “She’s homeless because she’s hoetic.” (whatever that means) Trishelle: “Jonna is a greedy bitch. She wanted to manipulate Jasmine into going in so that she can stay and get a piece of the pie.” The verdict is that Jonna should have stepped up and that poor, little Jasmine doesn’t have a chance.

10:42 – Girl’s heat 2 of Sam v. Jasmine begins with a Sam tackle in the tunnel and an easy stroll to the ring the bell. San Diego 1. Cancun 0. Girls’s Heat 2 is more of the same. Jasmine manages to stay standing this time, but Sam’s strength is too much for the petite Jasmine. San Diego 2. Cancun 0. Frank, in an unexpected move, is supportive on the sidelines. It is now all up to CJ to keep Cancun in this thing. Meanwhile, poor Jasmine can’t breath and feels like she has completely let her team down. Jasmine, if you heard the girl chatter before the arena, you may realize how far this is from the truth.

10:43 – Sarah’s pre-game analysis is not about whether Zach will win, but rather how many CJ bones he will break. This should be interesting.

10:44 – Boy’s Heat 1 of Zach v. CJ: After a mid-tunnel stalemate that lasts for an eternity, Zach starts to walk his way to the end of the tunnel. Suddenly, in a moment of athletic and adrenaline perseverance, CJ doubles back and drags Zach’s legs toward CJ’s side just long enough to trip Zach up for an instance, allowing CJ’s sprint to the bell to barely beat Zach’s diving jump. Team Cancun 1. Team San Diego 0. A stunned, but exuberant audience shot must mean a momentum building commercial break.

10:48 – Back to the action, Zach is not too pressed about his initial loss. CJ is an MMA fighter, four years older, and smart, by the way.

10:49 – Boy’s Heat 2 of Zach vs. CJ: This time the two competitors approach each other at full speed, largely avoid each other, and sprint/dive to the bell. CJ’s quickness outpaces Zach’s bigger frame to their respective bells. Team Cancun 2. Team San Diego 0. CJ wins the boys heat and the mighty Zach has fallen, for now.

10:49 – The tiebreaker coin toss selects the boys to compete to break the tie. Considering the results of the Boy’s Heat, advantage Team Cancun. Jasmine can be seen taking a major sigh. The best of three now wins. The loser of three goes home.

10:50 – Boy’s Heat 1: CJ goes low again and literally flips Zach over. Zach recovers and grabs ahold of CJ’s crawling feet. The audience goes wild. CJ drags Zach to the edge of the tunnel (closest to his bell), manages to free himself, and has an easy trot to the bell. CJ 1 (and three in a row!). Zach 0. Meanwhile, Jonna is torn because she wants to root for her team, but Zach is her man. Devyn amazing take: “Zach’s got to be pretty embarrassed. I mean, you are seven foot thirteen and you just got your ass beat by the same dude chasing your ex-girlfriend? You cannot be happy.”

10:51 – Boy’s Heat 2: In a move reminiscent of the leap/trot from Madden video games, Zach, in full stride, steps over CJ and easily reaches the bell before his opponent, evening the score. CJ 1. Zach 1. The crowd has a eerie silence. Sam, simply: “Do it again.” It’s time for another commercial break…

10:55 -TJ sets the scene as only he can: “Alright guys. The score is 1-1. This is the final round – the final heat. Whoever wins this round, stays in the game. Whoever loses goes home. You guys ready? Go!”

10:55 – Boy’s Heat 3:Like the first heat in the initial round, there is a collision mid-tunnel, but this time, Zach just keeps moving forward, pushing CJ out the other side of the tunnel. CJ tries to find a way to wrestle his opponent back, but Zach’s (“seven foot thirteen” according to Devyn) frame is just too big and strong. Zach wins (and has an unintentionally comedic celebration burst) one of the best Challenge battles of all-time and the most entertaining since surprise guest CT’s demolition of Johnny Bananas in the Gulag on Cutthroat. San Diego remains intact. CJ and Jasmine, two of the finest competitors this season, are going home. On that note, CJ carved out some Landon/Derrick territory on this challenge. He is a great competitor, a superior athlete, and good dude. He could definitely win one of these in the future.

10:58 – CJ and Jasmine leave like winners, praising the team success of Cancun. The irony of the episode is that it is Jonna’s self-centered move (and I am not qualifying this as a negative thing – her situation back home seems to be universally accepted as not too good) may have been the downfall of her team.

10:59 – Zach and Frank bond again over the win and slightly at the expense of Sam (they may not have ever expected her to do so well). Frank: “Let’s move on. It’s over now.” We will see, Mr. Sweeney. Retro-diary out.

After this epic battle, we are down to 3 teams of 4, two teams of 2, and 16 people left in this game. The rankings are getting even tighter as the power balance has officially shifted…here we go…

WEEKLY CHALLENGE INDIVIDUAL POWER RANKINGS

NOTE: the rankings will be based on an un-Hollinger/sabermetrics method known as “My experience and observations” (See: Marc Stein’s great NBA weekly power rankings). Weight will be given to how well teams and individuals do on competitions, in the social game, and whether he or she is a “good competitor.”

THE MEN

1 (1) Dustin (Team Las Vegas) – Dustin’s team strategy in The Hunger Games was flawless and another week out of the spotlight maintains his positioning.

2 (2) Chet (Team Brooklyn) – Despite his meal at grandma’s house, Chet’s team keeps winning and the viewer keeps benefiting from his verbal wit.

3 (8) Zach (Team San Diego) – He gains major points by overcoming CJ’s incredible arena assault and by differentiating himself from Frank’s “I’m not a crazy person” rant. Don’t mess with Zach athletically or he will crush you.

4 (5) Alton (Team Las Vegas) – Alton seemed to play a key role in Vegas’ great challenge strategy and what is more important, he seemed to have a good time doing it.

5 (6) Robb (Team St. Thomas) – Robb cracks the top 5 for the first time with some quality eating during The Hunger Games and a deserved acknowledgment for his longevity as the rookiest of rookies.

6 (7) JD (Team Brooklyn) – JD’s team keeps winning and this week, his eating skills played a key role (“Hold it down, JD!”).

7 (9) Frank (Team San Diego) – The end of the episode reconciliation with Zach avoided the bottom spot in the rankings, but going forward, Frank has got to keep his stuff to together.

8 (4) Derek (Team Cancun) – Although CJ and Jasmine went out as unified pair, Derek is right to worry about how he and Jasmine will fair alone.

ELIMINATED: CJ (Team Cancun) – CJ gave everything he had and then some this Challenge. I give him complete respect.

Biggest Rise: Zach (Team San Diego)

Biggest Fall: Derek (Team Cancun)

THE WOMEN

1 (1) Sarah (Team Brooklyn) – Once again, Sarah was instrumental in the Team Brooklyn win, going at those grape leaves and cow liver with an incredible confidence.

2 (2) Nany (Team Las Vegas) – Team Vegas played the Hunger Games just right and Nany is building her strength each week.

3 (4) Trishelle (Team Las Vegas) – Trishelle’s analysis of the both challenge and arena events was spot on.

4 (5) Marie (Team St. Thomas) – Marie may have been disqualified for vomiting, but her pepper domination, Frank listening performance, and St. Thomas survival skills move her to a fourth place ranking (her highest yet!).

5 (7) Devyn (Team Brooklyn) – Devyn justly deserves a spot in the top 5 for going along with the wig removal bet and for her continued sound bite excellence.

6 (8) Ashley (Team San Diego) – Ashley seemed to be the only eater performing in the challenge and has managed to stay out of much of the Team San Diego drama.

7 (9) Sam (Team San Diego) – Sam won her second straight arena and this time dominated her opponent. Frank and Zach have begun to believe in her.

8 (3) Jonna (Team Cancun) – Now vulnerable as a twosome, at this point in the game losing quality teammates is going to cause a rankings dip, but with as bad as Jonna needs to win the money, I would not be surprised if she can rise again.

ELIMINATED: Jasmine (Team Cancun) – Jasmine 2.0 is a mellow, loyal, and enjoyable individual who will be missed.

Biggest Rise: Sam (Team San Diego), Ashley (Team San Diego), Devyn (Team Brooklyn)

Biggest Fall: Jonna (Team Cancun)

FULL TEAM RANKINGS

Note: Team rankings are compiled by adding up the individual rankings and dividing by number of players remaining. Teams with the lowest total average ranking are ranked better than the highest (i.e. you want as few points as possible)

1 (1) TEAM LAS VEGAS Average: 2.5, last week: 3

Alton (4), Dustin (1), Trishelle (3), Nany (2)

Can they win as foursome? Yes, this remains the strongest, top to bottom 4 in The Challenge. Another week of no drama is only a good thing for this group. As previewed for next week, it will be interesting to see if Alton and Trishelle can support Nany and Dustin through the house drama.

What pairings can win? At this point, any pairing combination has a chance, though both ladies are likely to work better with Dustin.

2 (3) TEAM BROOKLYN Average: 3.5, last week: 5.25

Sarah (1), Chet (2), JD (6), Devyn (5)

Can they win as foursome? Devyn’s endurance is still going to be a question mark, but I am starting to believe in Team Brooklyn as a foursome. Their team camaraderie is unmatched and if their ability to work together plays a part in the final challenge, they may have a shot.

What pairings can win? Sarah and Chet can still win The Challenge. Sarah could probably get JD to the finish line as well. I am not sure Devyn would be able to finish with either Chet or Sarah and will be better within a foursome.

3 (4) TEAM ST. THOMAS Average: 4.5, last week: 5.5

Robb (5), Marie (4), Eliminated: Laura, Trey

Can they win as a pair? Wow. To even be here at this point in the game is a major accomplishment. They are enough below the radar (and have been all game) where I could foresee a series of events in a final challenge leading them to have a chance. We are at a place where it has to be considered.

4 (5) TEAM SAN DIEGO Average: 6.75, last week: 8.5

Zach (3), Sam (7), Ashley (6), Frank (7)

Can they win as foursome? Who knows. Sam’s endurance liability remains an issue and despite the brief détente at the end of the episode, they are a Frank breath away from a team implosion. I still think that Frank is better without Zach and Zach is better when he has something to prove to Frank.

What pairings can win? Both guys could compete with Ashley against the other strong teams (Vegas, Sarah/Chet), but the Zach/Sam pairing seems to have a dynamic, winning quality (at least in arenas).

5 (2) TEAM CANCUN Average: 8, last week: 4

Jonna (8), Derek (8), Eliminated: CJ, Jasmine

Can they win as a pair? Jonna is tough and Derek has proven himself to be a strong competitor, but without CJ, a heady and instrumental leader, I am not sure that this pairing has alone to be successful. Jonna’s drive to have a place to live must not be underestimated.

And finally, during the “NEXT ON THE CHALLENGE” preview, this is what I saw:

Robb struggles to “make it” in a water challenge.
Chet: “There is a fight in every corner of the house.” We see at least Nany, Marie, Frank, Dustin, Derek, Zach, and Robb involved (pretty much everyone).
Marie pushes Derek over into Sam and into some plant pots. Frank checks on Sam. This just appears to be the toughest of moments.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! There is no episode this week, so tune in on Wednesday, November 28 at 10 PM on MTV for the next episode of The Challenge: Battle of the Seasons.

David Bloom can be reached on twitter at @davidbloom7. His weekly CHALLENGE POWER RANKINGS come out weekly on Derek Kosinski’s UltimateChallengeRadio.com (listen to the incredible podcast featuring CJ and Zach this week). The Week 10 power rankings will be available sometime after November 29.

PRESEASON POWER RANKINGS – WOMEN DIVISION

THE ROOKIE

SOPHOMORES

THE WILDCARD

SOMETHING TO PROVE

READY TO SHOCK

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