5 Things, Blog Posts

5 Things You Need to Know: Noah

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When I see a movie in theaters, I will write the five things you need to know about it.

5 Things You Need to Know About…

NOAH

1) I saw Noah almost two weeks ago and up until now, did not think it too important to get the message out.

2) Although an afternoon screening, I spent most of the first act fighting off sleep. Was I tired and fatigued? Probably, but the product on screen didn’t help.

3) The biblical story of Noah has a few key tenets: Noah built an ark, there was a flood that eradicated the earth’s human population (besides Noah’s family), Noah saved the animals (two by two!) by housing them on the ark during the flood, and there was a dove that brought evidence of land to mark the end of the global catastrophe. You would think that an aspiring cinematic epic such as this movie that Darren Aronofsky hoped to make would at least hit all of these key points effectively. Unfortunately, the director of point-of-viewed The Fountain and Black Swan manages to gloss over most of the ark construction (in deference for angsty Ham and Shem emotional baggage) and creates one dimensional CGI animals that seem to be more alien to Noah and his family than the Giant Rock Transformer Angels were to EVERY member of the viewing audience.

4) Maybe I should have already put up a SPOILER ALERT on this one because studio publicity wants to maintain the secret for as long as possible, but the chatter seems to already have pervaded the cultural gossiper. In case you are living under the rocks that may have inspired them, in Darren Aronofsky’s Noah there are Giant Rock Transformer Angels who build arks, destroy humans through CGI magic (and weirdly and uncomfortably compelling action sequences), and disappear into heavenly light. You can’t make this stuff up.

5) Noah is a movie by a filmmaker (the aforementioned Aronofsky) whose incredible creativity, ambition, and vision execute story in a most fantastical way. Unfortunately, his fantastical musings often hit the wrong notes in the wrong ways and Noah is flooded with these inaccessible decisions.

"The Challenge", Blog Posts, Television

THE CHALLENGE: FREE AGENTS Season Predictions

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I have always been better at reflection than at prediction, but this won’t stop me from throwing a spoonful of subjective sauce into The Challenge: Free Agents prognostication pot. As we are about to embark on tonight’s much anticipated season premiere (at the time of writing, this is just a few hours away) and journey to Uruguay for the silver anniversary season of the Fifth Major American Professional Sport, here are my season predictions:

Best Interview

Awarded to the woman and the man competitors on FREE AGENTS who consistently give the most comedic interviews. RIVALS 2 winner: Paula; BATTLE OF THE SEASONS winners: Devyn and Chet

DEVYNDevyn

CHETChet

The Breakout

Awarded to the woman and the man competitors on FREE AGENTS who erupt out of their past CHALLENGE and REAL WORLD performances and personas, exceed expectations, and prove themselves as essential participants in future seasons. RIVALS 2 winner: Jemmye; BATTLE OF THE SEASONS winner: Chet

JESSICAJessica

PRESTONPreston

The Leap

Awarded to the woman and the man on FREE AGENTS who make the leap this season to elite status, solidifying themselves as perennial contenders in all future seasons of THE CHALLENGE. RIVALS 2 winner: Frank; BATTLE OF THE SEASONS winner: Dustin

JEMMYEJemmye

JORDANJordan

Rookie of the Year

Awarded to the season’s best performance by a first time THE CHALLENGE participant. RIVALS 2 winner: Jordan; BATTLE OF THE SEASONS winners: Frank

NIANia

Some Bold Predictions

 • Isaac will be a worthy candidate for “The Break Out” and will surprise many people with his performance.

• Frank will not make his third straight trip to the finals and will be a surprising early elimination.

• Jasmine will be the last member of her Real World: Cancun contingent in the game (Emilee and Jonna will be eliminated first).

• Zach is going to have a most successful comeback season that will be unexpectedly cut short in an unusual manner.

• There will be several times this season when Sarah will be missed.

• Johnny Bananas and CT will find themselves working together more in Free Agents than in any other season prior.

• TJ Lavin the great will take competition hosting to an entirely new level of “killing it.”

• Camila will be involved in the biggest fight of the season, but it will mostly not be her fault.

• The Johnny bobble head will have more screen time than Swift.

The Final Four

My predictions for the final four women and the final four men on FREE AGENTS.

LAUREL LaurelCARA MARIACara MariaJEMMYEJemmyeJESSICAJessica

CTCTJOHNNY BANANASJohnny BananasJORDANJordanDUSTINDustin

 Most Valuable Player

My predictions for the women and men who will win FREE AGENTS.

LAURELLaurel

JORDANJordan

"The Challenge", Features

THE CHALLENGE: FREE AGENTS Preseason Power Rankings – Women Division – Part II

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Culture Challenged will be following The Challenge: Free Agents every step of the way this season with commentary, interviews, recaps, Zapruder film analysis, and weekly power rankings.

The Men rankings can be found here: Part I  Part II

Read Part I of the Women Rankings here.

PRESEASON POWER RANKINGS – WOMEN DIVISION

THE NEW ELITE

6) NANYNany

Where did we last see her? After a tough disqualification in “The Blind Leading the Blind” challenge shocker on Rivals 2, Nany and Jonna lost a little bit of their sanity and edge (can you blame them?) and were eliminated a week later.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents is Nany’s third straight season on The Challenge. She was previously on Battle of the Seasons (season 23) and Rivals 2 (season 24).

From her MTV bio: Every time Nany arrives on The Challenge, she gives it her all. Unfortunately on Rivals II, and Battle of the Seasons, her all wasn’t quite enough. Nany declares, “I have this thing called the “Challenge Curse,” where I get eliminated right before finals. And I’m so sick of it. I just really, really, really want to get there this time and win.” With nothing holding her back this time, Nany is more determined than ever to prove she is a top competitor. However, this fun-loving lady quickly finds love in the house, giving her an unexpected ally and confidant. Is Nany still doomed by her Challenge Curse? Or will being a Free Agent finally take her to the end?

Why would you sign Nany? Nany’s loyalty runs thick and she certainly benefited from Dustin’s “big brother” presence on Battle of the Seasons. His return on Free Agents will be most welcome. Nany has been a particularly unfortunate victim of circumstances (weirdness from Trishelle and Alton on Battle of the Seasons and inhumane shock therapy on Rivals 2), and the Free Agents format should level the playing field. Although relatively successful, she may have taken a few steps backwards on Rivals 2. Her hunger to compete and win are unquestionable. Nany only benefits from having an “unexpected ally and confidant.”

Why would you not sign Nany? I may not agree with this “Challenge Curse” notion, but if she does and it is in her head, this could pose a problem. Nany is a feeler and sometimes she lets her emotions (and the effects of alcohol) get the best of her. She has had strong partners or teams in her first two seasons and she was an important member of them, but how she will fair as a solo artist remains to be seen.

Potential Allies: This aforementioned “unexpected ally and confidant”; Dustin and Leroy (Las Vegas Strong is the Strongest); Jonna

Potential Enemies: Frank and Nany have some difficult history; Memories of Adam Royer

Best-case scenario: Nany, set up for success in Challenges for years to come, has a flawless third season, wins some challenges, takes out worthy competition in eliminations, and rides this momentum into the finals.

Worst-case scenario: Nany’s “Challenge Curse” premonitions are real. She is a “The Draw” victim early, faces a strong competitor targeted by that episode’s challenge winner, and goes home prematurely.

The Verdict: Supported by more established relationships, this new mystery man, and Dustin’s consummate loyalty, Nany will have a bounce back season on Free Agents and will be in the mix to make the finals at the end.

IT’S COMPLICATED

5) CAMILA

CamilaWhere did we last see her? We last saw Camila and #teamsubtitles partner, Jemmye, struggle in the first day of the finals of Rivals 2. To the end, communication was never their collective strong suit.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents is Camila’s sixth straight challenge (the second longest current streak). She has previously been on Cutthroat (season 20), Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), Battle of the Seasons (season 23), Rivals 2 (season 24 and her second finals trip). She and partner Johnny Bananas won Battle of the Exes. She is the only women on Free Agents who has won before.

From her MTV bio: While several of her fellow competitors have made it to a final, Camila is the only girl on Free Agents who knows the thrill of Challenge victory. After winning Battle of the Exes, Camila advanced to the finals of Rivals II, but finished a disappointing third. She’s ready to redeem that performance, stating, “I’m at that point in my Challenge history that I want that big money no matter what. I don’t care who I have to cross. I will do what I have to do.” Fearless and feisty, this Brazilian bombshell doesn’t flinch when it comes to daring physical feats or dishing out a verbal assault. Can Camila keep her temper in check long enough to make another final? Or will an emotional meltdown send her packing?

Why would you sign Camila? She is “fearless and feisty” and one of the most experienced women competing. Camila’s win on Battle of the Exes was most impressive. When Camila is checked into the game and not into extracurricular nighttime activity drama, she is unstoppable. After recent disappointments over the last two seasons (especially on Battle of the Seasons), Free Agents could prove to have a redemptive quality. Freed from the partnership challenges she has had the last two seasons (Rivals 2 was all about communication difficulty. Battle of the Seasons was all about being on a dysfunctional team with Big Easy), Free Agents can all be about Camila competing against the limits and with the strengths of herself and herself alone.

Why would you not sign Camila? At least one emotional meltdown is to be expected during the season, and, without a partner to hold her back, how will she fair? The target on her back always seems to be large and her strongest competition will immediately see her as a threat.

Potential Allies: Will she get along with Johnny again this season? She and Jemmye had a tough ending, but were largely compatible most of Rivals 2.

Potential Enemies: Alcohol at night; Expressing herself so that others understand her; Frank and Camila have often kept it close to upheaval

Best-case scenario: Camila maintains a laser competitive focus all season and fearlessly fights off the competition to another finals appearance and shot at finals victory.

Worst-case scenario: Camila’s worst-case scenario is always the extent and forum of her emotional meltdown. In an elimination (as it was with Big Easy on Battle of the Seasons) is different than the night before a men’s elimination.

The Verdict: I have a feeling that Camila is going to thrive under the Free Agents format. As her MTV bio conveys, she is thinking about things like this point “in her Challenge history.” She gets that she has an opportunity to move into the next tier of Challenge greats (any women two-time winner is in elite company – Paula, Tori, Susie, Rachel) and will keep this in mind throughout this season. I expect at least a trip to the finals and she will be one of the short handful of contenders who could win it all.

A FINAL GO-ROUND?

4) ANEESAAneesa

Where did we last see her? We last saw Aneesa valiantly fighting toward a fourth place finish in the women’s bracket (her pairing with Diem was the final women team eliminated before the finals) in Rivals 2 and occasionally running through altercations while working out on the Thailand house deck.

CHALLENGE History: With Free Agents, Aneesa ties The Challenge record for most seasons with 10 (Paula and now Johnny and CT share the distinction). Previous seasons include: Battle of the Sexes (season 6! In 2003!), Battle of the Sexes 2 (season 9), The Gauntlet 2 (season 11), The Duel (season 13), The Inferno 3 (season 14), The Duel 2 (season 17), Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), and Rivals 2 (season 24).

From her MTV bio: Talk about an unstoppable force, “Elimination Queen” Aneesa arrives on Free Agents after a devastating exit one spot short of the Rivals II final. Aneesa is brimming with confidence going into Free Agents, “Doubt me all you want. I’m more about being humble and letting my actions speak for themselves. I have the heart and fight. I don’t, I never quit. Ever.” Aneesa may be a threat on the field, but this opinionated vet can rub some of her housemates the wrong way. Will Aneesa be able to fight her way to the top? Or will she face another crushing elimination?

Why would you sign Aneesa? You don’t get the nickname (as coined by MTV.com “writers”) “Elimination Queen” without being a force when facing adversity. Over ten seasons, Aneesa has shown great competitive improvement throughout the years, and, after an awesome run on Rivals 2, deserves to be “brimming with confidence.” Although not always able to have a bite as loud as her bark (don’t tell that to Trashelle Trishelle), Aneesa is now as wise as she is tough. If there was ever a season on The Challenge where she was due for her long sought after win, it is with the solo artist format of Free Agents. You don’t get to come back on The Challenge a record (tied with the Bananas/CT/Paula tri-force) nine times without doing something right.

Why would you not sign Aneesa? After CT got over the hump last season, Aneesa’s 0-9 record heading into Free Agents must mean something. Aneesa has been fighting Challenge mother time for many seasons, and, although she seems as strong as ever before, something will have to give at some point. Could Free Agents be that season?

Potential Allies: Always seemingly on a small island on the wrong side of the alliance, at this point whomever can improve her chances of winning

Potential Enemies: Much of the history among Johnny, CT, and Aneesa is not all warm and cuddly

Best-case scenario: Aneesa thrives in the every woman for herself format of Free Agents, builds off some of her Rivals 2 momentum and confidence, and comes out of the gate taking no prisoners. She fears no one, other women fear her, and she destroys the competition on a journey to her third finals appearance and a legitimate shot to win.

Worst-case scenario: A worst-case scenario for Aneesa is a season where she is eliminated somewhere in the middle of the pack and retires from competition without one final close chance at winning her first Challenge.

The Verdict: I am torn on Aneesa this year and keep going back and forth over what type of season she will have. A bit of a refreshing surprise on Rivals 2, it is going to be difficult for her to replicate her success on Free Agents. At the same time, she was made for a season on The Challenge that may ask each competitor to prove her or himself more frequently in elimination situations (something that Aneesa has proven to be very successful at). The jury remains in deliberation on this one.

THE LEAP

3) JEMMYEJemmye

Where did we last see her? Jemmye, despite her #teamsubtitles trials and tribulations with partner Camila, made it all the way to the finals (a day one elimination) in Rivals 2.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Jemmye’s third straight season on The Challenge. She made it to the finals on Rivals 2 (season 24) and earned Challenge cred for competing on the same team as Knight on Battle of the Seasons (season 23).

From her MTV bio: Jemmye proved to be a true competitor on Rivals II, reaching the finals in only her second Challenge. The epitome of “work hard, play hard,” this former Division I athlete is ready to top last season’s performance. She explains, “At this point, the only thing that’s acceptable is first or second. If I don’t get first or second, then I didn’t do what I came here to do.” Brimming with confidence, Jemmye will take on the most daredevil tasks in challenges and has no fear when it comes to elimination rounds, “I’ve been to enough eliminations at this point where I’ll go in against whoever, but I’m not gonna count any of these females out.”

Why would you sign Jemmye? Jemmye is a perfect combination of athletic ability and physical toughness. Like fellow New Orleans cast mate, Preston, she will have an automatic bump in performance without Knight’s troubling shadow hanging over the festivities and CT bodyguard detail. After tasting the finals on Rivals 2, she can say things like this, “At this point, the only thing that’s acceptable is first or second. If I don’t get first or second, then I didn’t do what I came here to do.” Jemmye is here for a reason. She combines a healthy balance of fearlessness and respect for the competition. She can negotiate challenging communication situations (the #teamsubtitles experience).

Why would you not sign Jemmye? With only two previous seasons under her belt, she is still a relative newcomer against some of the more established veterans. She has never had to face Laurel in a Challenge before.

Potential Allies: She definitely had her girl group on Rivals 2 and didn’t rile too many feathers

Potential Enemies: Ketchup bottles; Lingering Knight-mares

Best-case scenario: Jemmye’s best-case scenario involves a return trip to the finals and at least a second place finish (because if not, she “didn’t do what she came here to do”).

Worst-case scenario: Jemmye’s luck of “The Draw” results put her in a competitive elimination round against someone like Aneesa, Nany, or Laurel and she loses a close battle.

The Verdict: Jemmye is one of the few women competitors who seems be a lock to be in the mix for the finals. She has improved exponentially in her first two seasons and may just be ready to take it to an elite level. I would not be surprised to see her successfully competing at the end.

2) CARA MARIACara Maria

Where did we last see her? We last saw Cara, a too frequent fellow cast mate punching bag and producer go-to replacement, embrace underdog status with partner Cooke all the way to a finals appearance and an eventual second place finish on Rivals 2.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Cara Maria’s (and this is incredible) seventh straight season on The Challenge, but her first of the last three in which she was not a late-game replacement (for whatever happened to Real World: Sydney on Battle of the Seasons and for Naomi on Rivals 2). Her previous seasons are: Fresh Meat II (season 19), Cutthroat (season 20), Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), Battle of the Seasons (season 23), and Rivals 2 (season 24). She has made three appearances in the finals (Cutthroat, Rivals with Laurel, and Rivals 2 with Cooke), but has never won.

From her MTV bio: After three runner-up finishes, Cara Maria is ready to stop being an underdog and take her rightful place as a legitimate threat to win. Cara Maria arrives in Uruguay in the best shape of her life, but believes her mental outlook is keeping her from taking first place. She elaborates, “I know physically I can do anything, but mentally I second-guess myself. It’s almost like I’m afraid to win.” Pegged as an oddball, Cara Maria yearns to break free of the social awkwardness that has plagued her in the past. Is Free Agents finally Cara Maria’s time to shine? Or will her unlucky streak continue?

Why would you sign Cara Maria? You would sign Cara because if she can get the mental game straight (even the acknowledgement of it is a major step forward), she is going to be a physical beast (and she came this close on Rivals 2 to beating the incredible Paula and Emily domination force). Cara Maria “arrives in Uruguay in the best shape of her life.” She also arrives in Uruguay when everyone else arrives – something that hasn’t happened to this replacement player since Battle of the Exes. Having her bestie Laurel to support her and push her to achieve will be a major boost to an already burgeoning confidence. She is one of the few women who CT will always support (not a bad male ally to have – especially defending champion CT).

Why would you not sign Cara Maria? Until she wins, the mental second guessing remains in play. Challenge houses are difficult places to live, and, based on the edit, Cara struggles with the conditions more than most.

Potential Allies: Laurel (Fresh Meat II and Rivals Strong); CT

Potential Enemies: Johnny Bananas and his continent have never been Cara’s biggest supporters

Best-case scenario: The wide-open Free Agents plays to all of Cara’s strengths. Freed from the ups and downs of symbiotic partnerships, her self-reliance and personal drive are catalysts for excellent performance in challenges and in potential eliminations. She makes a return trip to the finals and positions herself for a win.

Worst-case scenario: Cara’s worst-case scenario is some type of confidence destroying experience that takes the wind and drive out of her sails and forces her into an early elimination unprepared mentally and physically, eventually losing to an inferior competitor who took advantage of her heightened emotional state.

The Verdict: Cara Maria is going to kill it (TJ would be proud) on Free Agents. She is on my short short list to win it all.

THE FRONTRUNNER

1) LAURELLaurel

Where did we last see her? Laurel has been off-duty (for three long seasons – her return is most welcome) since building a lasting friendship and eventual finals run with Cara Maria on Rivals (season 22)

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Laurel’s fourth season on The Challenge, although it seems like she has been on many more. In each of her three previous seasons – Fresh Meat II (season 19 and partnered with Kenny), Cutthroat, and Rivals (partnered with Cara Maria) – she made the finals, but has yet to win.

From her MTV bio: Last seen making a runner-up finish on Rivals, Laurel returns to The Challenge after a three-season layoff. She may have made the final in every Challenge she’s competed in, but a win still eludes this fierce competitor. Laurel hopes Free Agents will allow her to break the streak, “I’ve had three second-place finishes which is somewhat impressive, yet disappointing at the same time. I’ve been waiting to be on my own and this is a chance for every person to show what they’ve got individually.” Unlike many of her peers, Laurel can separate her emotions from the competition, but her road to victory takes an unexpected turn when she falls for one of her fellow competitors. Can Laurel maintain her laser focus and keep her eye on the prize? Or will romantic entanglements derail her plans?

Why would you sign Laurel? Laurel, despite an 0-3 finals record, is at her best, one of the most dominant women in The Challenge modern era (right up there with Ev, Emily, and late career (happy wedding!) Paula). She, of all competitors in both the Men and Women division, was made for the solo artist format of Free Agents. After three seasons off, she is going to be in the best mental and physical shape of any previous challenge she has been on. Laurel steps into Free Agents a so much happier and healthier version of herself. Of all twenty-eight people ranked in these power rankings, the only givens were that Johnny and CT would be either no. 1 and/or no. 2 for the Men and Laurel would be no. 1 for the Women (By the way, if Emily were competing in Free Agents, I would still choose Laurel over her in the preseason rankings – her competitor status is just that prolific).

Why would you not sign Laurel? There may be a little rust to clean off after a three season hiatus. She is definitively “the one to beat” among the women and will have to fight against the target on her back the entire season. She has no experience competing against some of the new elite (Jordan, Dustin, Frank, Nany, Jemmye) and it is unclear how their relationships will play out.

Potential Allies: Cara Maria (Fresh Meat II and Rivals Strong); CT

Potential Enemies: The field (because it is really a game of Laurel vs. the field)

Best-case scenario: Laurel, hungry, wiser, and more determined from her prolonged break, absolutely crushes it, winning challenges, gut-testing eliminations, and the admiration and respect of all of her fellow competitors. This reign of excellence culminates in her first win on The Challenge.

Worst-case scenario: She spends the entire season fighting off the obvious target on her chest, and, after winning many close calls, succumbs to an up-and-coming competitor in a late game elimination.

The Verdict: I think the three year break and Free Agents format will galvanize and inspire this already fierce competition destroyer to reach another finals and once again be there at the end, fighting for the win.

Next Up: A quick post of season predictions and preseason awards leading up to the 90 minutes season premiere of The Challenge: Free Agents at 10:00 PM on Thursday, April 10 on MTV.

"The Challenge", Features, Television

THE CHALLENGE: FREE AGENTS Preseason Power Rankings – Women Division – Part I

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Culture Challenged will be following The Challenge: Free Agents every step of the way this season with commentary, interviews, recaps, Zapruder film analysis, and weekly power rankings.

The Men rankings can be found here: Part I  Part II

And then it begins…on to part 1 of the The Challenge: Free Agents Preseason Power Rankings – Women Division.

PRESEASON POWER RANKINGS – WOMEN DIVISION

THE ROOKIE

14) LATOYALaToya

Where did we last see her? The last time we saw LaToya she was BFFing with Marie and giving Swifty the habitual cold shoulder on Real World: Seclusion St. Thomas.

CHALLENGE History: She is a rookie on The Challenge: Free Agents.

From her MTV bio: Feisty and energetic, rookie LaToya comes into this game focused on one thing, making it to the end. LaToya reveals, “I don’t care about all the beefs. I’m here for the almighty dollar.” LaToya may not be into creating drama, but she isn’t afraid to stand up for herself. Upon learning the game-changing format, LaToya is confident about her chances despite her rookie status. She declares, “The new kids on the block actually have a chance, a strong chance at winning.” Look for this newbie to make an impression, but could her wild-card status make her a target?

Why would you sign LaToya? As the MTV bio contends, she is “feisty and energetic” and this can be a good thing. She did manage to stay out of most of the drama on her Real World season and seems to get along really well with other women. When push comes to shove, she will defend herself.

Why would you not sign LaToya? She appears to be a classic Challenge rookie: happy to be there, but not going to stay for very long – in year one you pay your dues. When watching Real World: ill-advised location St. Thomas, the only person who seemed less of natural fit for The Challenge was Brandon. On a pure physical comparison, she may have a hard time up against the more physically dominating fellow women of this season (Laurel, Nia, Jemmye, Nany, Aneesa).

Potential Allies: Challenge rookies and sophomores like Jessica and Nia; I have a feeling she is going to hit it off with Jasmine

Potential Enemies: Have she and Swifty worked out their business? Veterans looking to target a rookie, but are afraid of Hurricane Nia may target LaToya.

Best-case scenario: Some internal dissension among the women target strong competitors first to go into eliminations, and LaToya sticks around longer than expected.

Worst-case scenario: LaToya’s rookie status places her in the first elimination and “The Draw” comes up with a veteran competitor who will not be losing to a rookie in a first elimination.

The Verdict: I am not sure what to make of LaToya’s participation this year on The Challenge, but I think it will be both short and memorable enough to want to see her come back another time.

 

SOPHOMORES

13) EMILEEEmilee

Where did we last see her? Emilee’s last Challenge ride was as the original Captain of the Blue Team on Cutthroat. She and fellow Real World: Cancun castmate, Derek, were eliminated in the first episode.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Emilee’s second Challenge and the first episode of this season will also be her second episode on The Challenge in light of her aforementioned early elimination on Cutthroat (season 20).

From her MTV bio: Last seen being eliminated first on Cutthroat, Emilee is back for a second chance on Free Agents. This Boston native may not be the most intimidating athlete in the house, but believes she has what it takes to excel in other aspects of the game. She confides, “I’m really great when it comes to puzzles. I’ve got a brain and it’s not all good looks and girlish charm.” Fun and flirtatious, Emilee quickly sets her sights on a newly single guy, but discovers that on The Challenge, competition isn’t limited to the playing field. Watch for Emilee to make a new rival when they clash over one guy’s affections.

Why would you sign Emilee? Her first Challenge experience was so short that people may underestimate her. She could be afforded both the benefits of being a rookie (people are intrigued, fresh start) and may not have to face some of the downsides (first person targeted). She is a Boston native. Her little Real World: Cancun group of women could make some collective noise (and I am not referring to that one night a Challenge in which Jasmine has a little too much to drink).

Why would you not sign Emilee? For all intensive purposes, she is like a rookie and this may not be the best thing. Her elimination on Cutthroat was a long time ago and some of the game’s women power players have changed since then. There traditionally aren’t that many puzzles on The Challenge.

Potential Allies: Jonna and Jasmine (Cancun Strong); fellow “Bostonians” CT and Johnny and current resident Zach

Potential Enemies: Whomever this “new rival” is alluded to in her bio

Best-case scenario: The best-case scenario is that Emilee gets a favorable match-up in an early elimination, wins, and then manages to stay out of the limelight longer into this game than expected.

Worst case scenario: The winners have a soft spot for LaToya and are afraid of Nia, so Emilee is the next logical first women thrown into the first elimination.

The Verdict: This is a deep group of strong women and I just don’t see Emilee surviving beyond the first two or three episodes. Prove me wrong, fellow Bostonian!

 

12) DEVYNDevyn

Where did we last see her? We last saw Devyn, although a breakout interview star throughout the season, struggling to compete against the formidable Namibian Desert maelstrom that was the Battle of the Seasons final challenge.

CHALLENGE History: Battle of the Seasons (season 23) was Devyn’s first finals appearance on her first Challenge (fellow Brooklyn alums Sarah and Chet had a little bit to do with this).

From her MTV bio: We last saw Devyn being dragged up a sand dune by her teammates in the final challenge of Battle of the Seasons, where she took third place. Although you’re still more likely to find this NYC diva shopping on Fifth Avenue than hitting the gym, Devyn is ready to quiet the haters and prove it takes more than muscle to win The Challenge. She explains, “I’ve gotten a lot of comments that I’m not athletic or people think that I can’t compete. But I don’t think you have to be a fitness pro to win this.” Devyn is a shrewd political player and extremely well liked by her fellow competitors. Can Devyn make up for her weaknesses on the field with crafty gameplay? Or will this fierce fashionista unravel under pressure?

Why would you would sign Devyn? She has an infectious and hilarious personality and excels at the social game. Besides a situation in which teammates have to rely on her to perform athletically, she is always a joy to have around. Battle of the Seasons must have given a taste of what it means to compete, knowledge that she can use to her advantage this time around.

Why would you not sign Devyn? Despite her proclamations that you don’t have to be “a fitness pro to win this,” endurance is a component of the final challenge and if you don’t have it, you won’t be able to win. The Battle of the Seasons format played to her strengths (great teammate, positive attitude, hysterical), but Free Agents may play to her weaknesses (athletic and competitive drive).

Potential Allies: Doesn’t everyone get along with Devyn? She and LaToya are going to be fast friends (if only there were shopping options in Uruguay).

Potential Enemies: The heat of her hair

Best-case scenario: I think a finish somewhere in the middle is the best-case scenario for Devyn. The women at the top of this bracket are just too strong to make it that far. I can see her having a gutsy elimination win where she proves everybody wrong. There is also a scenario where other competitors keep her around because they see her as someone they can beat in the Finals. However, in a an every person for his or herself format, it is going to be most difficult to fall through any cracks and this scenario is highly unlikely.

Worst-case scenario: Her worst-case scenario is bad luck with “The Draw” and a tough elimination competitor to face because Devyn is not going to get picked to go in early eliminations.

The Verdict: Anything in the range of the top seven or eight women is a victory for Devyn and I have feeling she is going to get there, but not much further. We viewers all benefit from having her comedic potential around as long as possible, so let us hope that her sophomore slump is not too dramatic.

 

THE WILDCARD

11) NIANia

Where did we last see her? Nia was last seen embodying a natural weather phenomenon in the Real World: Portland house, leaving a path of fear, destruction, and devastation in her wake.

CHALLENGE History: Although Nia is a Challenge rookie, her stormy reputation will not be a surprise to anyone.

From her MTV bio: “Hurricane” Nia was last seen wreaking havoc on the Real World: Portland where she terrorized her roommates. Having matured and mellowed from the experience, this Challenge rookie assures that she is more interested in competition than stirring things up in the house. Nia declares, “I do intimidate people, but not on purpose. I don’t really know what it’s like to lose. I am going to win. There is no other option.” Nia may have the competitive drive it takes to win the Challenge, but will she be able to hold back her inner hurricane?

Why would you sign Nia? When she says, “I don’t really know what it’s like to lose. I am going to win,” you believe her. When she says, “I do intimidate people, but not on purpose,” the consideration of the intent is lost in the intimidation factor. She has spent lots of time around professional athletes (according to her book on dating) and may have picked up some moves. She is a tall and strong woman who will have many a physical advantage over the majority of her fellow women. A “matured and mellowed” Nia added on to the dominating force that she already is could be a dangerous thing for other competitors.

Why would you not sign Nia? “Will she be able to hold back her inner hurricane?” – this is a fair question. Those who do not fear her will want her eliminated as soon as possible.

Potential Allies: Jess (Portland Strong)

Potential Enemies: Certainly Johnny and maybe Jordan (Portland Not So Strong); There is no way she and Camila (a tropical storm at times in her own right) see eye to eye

Best-case scenario: Nia decidedly wins challenges and eliminations, corrals her weather systems, and works her way to a conceivable shot at the finals.

Worst-case scenario: Hurricane Nia detection has improved since Portland. Some of the savvier veterans target her early and often in an attempt to diffuse her threat.

The Verdict: Part of the experience of Hurricane Nia on Real World: Portland was unpredictability. Unpredictability is not something that usually succeeds on The Challenge. I think Nia may struggle to find her footing in her rookie campaign.

 

SOMETHING TO PROVE

10) THERESATheresa

Where did we last see her? An original competitor from Fresh Meat II, Theresa had one of her most memorable Challenges on Rivals 2. Unfortunately, the erroneous team vote for Leroy ended up being strategically misguided.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Theresa’s fifth season. Previous seasons include Fresh Meat II (season 19), Cutthroat (season 20), Rivals (season 21), and Rivals 2 (season 24). Her best previous finish was Top 5 (among women) on Fresh Meat II.

From her MTV bio: Returning for her fifth challenge, Theresa is optimistic about her chances in Free Agents. Hampered in past games by relationship drama and unreliable partners, Theresa is ready to let her impressive athletic abilities speak for themselves. She explains, “Since my friends usually always screw me over in this game, I love that I can rely on myself and only myself.” Theresa may be comfortable with the physical aspects of the Challenge, but she’ll have to dig deep to harness the mental toughness it takes to win. Theresa notes, “If you get me riled up, I don’t keep my cool.” Will Free Agents give Theresa the opportunity to shine? Or is she one outburst away from a plane ticket home?

Why would you sign Theresa? Like her Fresh Meat II cast mate Brandon, this could be a make or break season for Theresa on The Challenge, so her level of competitiveness may be heightened. She has not traditionally been matched with the most dominant teams or partners, so the individual format could be to her advantage. She is one tough cookie and will not back down from anyone (This pugnacity landed her spots on Rivals opposite Camila and Rivals 2 opposite Jasmine). You can sense her hunger.

Why would you not sign Theresa? Despite circumstances out of her control, her track record is not the strongest (she has never been within an elimination of the finals). Relationship drama seems to follow her during most Challenges. Her pugnacity is sometimes on the edge of volatility.

Potential Allies: Jasmine (Rivals 2 Strong)

Potential Enemies: Laurel, Cara Maria; Things did not end well with Jordan

Best-case scenario: The Free Agents format caters to Theresa’s talents and she becomes one of the key competitors in challenges, winning some, and avoiding early eliminations. With a little bit of luck from the infamous “The Draw,” she could be a long shot to make the finals.

Worst-case scenario: She seals her partner for Rivals 3 early on. This bodes well for her return for another season, but does not bode well for Free Agents.

The Verdict: I could go either way on Theresa. She and Nia are definitely the two from the back half of the preseason rankings who I would not be surprised to see in the top group at the end. I do not for a second question Theresa’s drive to compete and have a hunch she is going to be around for a while, but if the trailer does in fact show us an elimination round against Laurel, that will mark the end of her game.

 

9) JASMINEJasmine

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jasmine, despite an embarrassing women voting debacle in her second to last week, have one of her best Challenge performances to date on Rivals 2 (while partnered with Theresa).

CHALLENGE History: Incredibly, Free Agents is Jasmine’s fifth straight season on The Challenge. Previously she appeared on Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), Battle of the Seasons (season 23), and Rivals 2 (season 24). Her best finish was in the top 8 (of women) on Battle of the Seasons.

From her MTV bio: Pint-size siren Jasmine made it halfway through Rivals II paired with her nemesis, Theresa. Having conquered her fears, Jasmine is excited to compete on her own. Jasmine reveals, “Free Agents, this is the kind of challenge for me. I think people are going to be really surprised because I can really hold my own and I’ve got some fight in me.” Prepared for anything, Jasmine is determined to enjoy her time on Free Agents and immediately sets her sights on a younger man. Jasmine confesses, “I’m single, I’m gonna have a little bit of fun. So, that’s what I’m gonna do right now.” Will Jasmine’s small stature hold her back? Or can she prove Free Agents really is anyone’s game?

Why would you sign Jasmine? Jasmine can be so much fun to have around and now that she is “single,” watch out. No one has ever questioned her fight or drive (maybe her state of sanity when intoxicated though). Despite a slightly better finish on Battle of the Seasons than on Rivals 2, she has performed so much better on her last two Challenges than she did on her first two Challenges. She is trending up for a reason.

Why would you not sign Jasmine? Her size continues to have some limitations in physical challenges and the women this season are not getting any smaller. Her track record on The Challenge is mixed at best and Jasmine may be better served on a larger team (as was the case on Battle of the Seasons) than all by herself.

Potential Allies: It’s complicated, but Jonna and Emilee (interesting Real World: Cancun cohort), Theresa (Rivals 2 strong)

Potential Enemies: Dating back to her first two seasons…wine glasses.

Best-case scenario: Jasmine gets lucky, stays out of eliminations because of her strong social game, and when she does have to go in, faces someone who she can beat. She lasts until the middle of the season.

Worst-case scenario: The worst-case scenario involves some misfortune courtesy of “The Draw” and is then physically overmatched in an early elimination.

The Verdict: Barring some crummy luck, Jasmine is going to make it into the middle rounds of this game (Top 8 or 9 women), but will not go much further than that.

 

8) JONNAJonna

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jonna struggle with electrocution and partner communication on her second to last challenge before losing to Cara Maria and Cooke in a late game Rivals 2 Jungle Elimination.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents will be Jonna’s third straight Challenge season and fourth overall. Her Team Cancun almost made the finals on Battle of the Seasons (season 23). She was on Rivals (season 21) and Rivals 2 (season 24).

From her MTV bio: Reeling from a series of dramatic Challenge showmances, Jonna has one priority this season, herself. She confesses, “Every single Challenge that I competed in, I’ve always been concerned about someone else. But this time around it’s about me.” With a brand-new mindset, Jonna comes into Free Agents on a mission to prove she’s a real contender, “I’m here to prove to everyone and even more importantly, prove to myself that I am a strong, confident woman.” Will Jonna succeed on her mission and reach a final at last? Or will she once again become a Challenge casualty?

Why would you sign Jonna? Each of the past two seasons, she has had strong male partnerships. She is a strong performer in challenges. As stated in her bio, she comes into Free Agents with a little chip on her shoulder and something to prove to the competition.

Why would you not sign Jonna? Can she stay away from showmances that may not always be the best thing for her game? Jonna can sometimes have rocky relationships with some of the other women competitors. She has yet to prove how well she can do on her own (strong teams and partnerships have helped her succeed on the last two seasons)

Potential Allies: Jasmine and Emilee (Cancun Strong); Nany (Rivals 2 Strong); Frank

Potential Enemies: What remains from her relationships with Zach and Jordan?

Best-case scenario: Jonna gets her game over the hump, is all about Jonna, and competes at the kind of high level she is capable of, giving her an outside shot into the top group of finals prospective participants.

Worst-case scenario: Jonna has another shomance, but this time, the Free Agents format puts a target on her chest that forces her into an early elimination against the not so luck of “The Draw.”

The Verdict: On a totally subjective hunch, I would not be surprised if this is not Jonna’s best season and she leaves the show earlier than expected. I could also be easily convinced of the opposite, but I will embrace and own my feeling that Jonna will “once again become a Challenge casualty.”

 

READY TO SHOCK

7) JESSICAJessica

Where did we last see her? We last saw Jess, albeit ever so briefly, earning her Challenge nickname, Princess Hulk, for her valiant performance in defeat in the second episode of Rivals 2.

CHALLENGE History: Free Agents is Jessica’s second season on The Challenge. She and partner Anastasia (a tough go on her first The Challenge season) were eliminated in their second episode.

From her MTV bio: Good girl Jessica left Rivals II following her partner Anastasia’s epic meltdown. No longer held back by a teammate, Free Agents is Jessica’s chance to show what she’s made of. Jessica proclaims, “I don’t think people see me as a threat this time because I didn’t last very long in the previous Challenge. I have to play it cool and then just bam, hit them with it.” Although she claims she’s not looking for romance in the house, Jessica is all smiles when she makes an instant love connection. Don’t underestimate this former pageant queen—when it comes to performing in challenges, she just might shock everyone.

Why would you sign Jessica? Jessica is making personal training her profession and enters Free Agents in phenomenal shape. When asked to perform athletically (anything involving heights may be the exception), she is primed to dominate. Without many complicated past relationships, she brings a fresh perspective to the festivities that will be particularly useful in the “nothing to lose, everything to win” solo mission that will be Free Agents.

Why would you not sign Jessica? Her first season could not have been shorter, so she comes into Free Agents as basically a rookie. She is not too aware of the hows and whys of the social/strategic game.

Potential Allies: Nia (Portland Strong), LaToya

Potential Enemies: Zach; CT; unnecessary drama; Camila

Best-case scenario: Get ready: Jessica’s best-case scenario is an outside chance at being in the top group of women with a potential shot at making the finals.

Worst-case scenario: Free Agents is dominated by veteran alliances and Jess is unable to clean off the lingering rookie dust, forcing her into early elimination battles against formidable foes pulled from “The Draw.”

The Verdict: My The Challenge bold predictions have always had a wide range of outcomes (some obviously more successful than others), but I won’t let it stop me here. Bold Prediction: Jessica “might just shock everyone” and is a dark horse candidate to make the finals. I was surprised when she made an appearance in one the few MTV promotional videos airing on television (one featured CT, one featured Bananas, one featured the always entertaining, Camila) and I have a feeling that this was intentional on MTV’s part. I look for her to have a breakout second season on The Challenge: Free Agents.

PART II will come out later in the week.

 

Features, NBA, Rank Everything

RANK EVERYTHING: Vacation Destinations (compiled from the hometowns of Spurs players)

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This is the second installment of a new features series called RANK EVERYTHING.  In each installment, I will take a topic or category from pop culture and sports, no matter how essential (all-time favorite NBA players, a Lost character fantasy draft), random (best use of the name Walter), or essentially random (the third tracks off every U2 album a.k.a. The “With or Without You/One” Battle to the death), and make a ranking on a given scale or set of criteria.  Some rankings will be of manageable length (10-20), some rankings may be of a slightly unmanageable length (if I ever get around to my Top 100 movies, albums, or TV show lists), and some rankings may feature only one or two items (For example – Best/Strangest Use of “World” when an NBA player changes his name: 2. Metta World Peace [formally Ron Artest]; 1. World B Free [formally Lloyd Free]).  The goal: to rank everything.

One additional note: rankings will always count down: the lower the number, the [insert given adjective/qualifer here] the item.

RANK EVERYTHING: Vacation Destinations (compiled from the hometowns of the current members of the San Antonio Spurs)

The Vacation Destinations will be based on a hypothetical ten day trip during a time of year of my choice. Travel time will be considered. The ranking is entirely subjective.

The why: On my way to work a few days ago, while considering last Thursday night’s loss to OKC that ended the Spurs incredible streak of nineteen straight wins (their last previous loss was back on February 21!), I went down a rabbit hole of Spurs related thoughts. I am astounded by their fifteen years of excellent basketball. I am in awe of their system, of the genius of Gregg Popovich (what I would do to get an inside look inside his brilliant basketball mind), and of the culture of winning that they continue to foster. Always a compilation of international players, it has been a while since the years of Fabricio Oberto, Rasho Nesterovic, and Beno Udrih. I wondered: Do the Spurs still have as high a number of international players (another consistent attribute of the “House that Popovich and Duncan Built” success story) as they usually do? The answer: Yes they do. Five of fourteen players on the Spurs current roster were born in the United States (six if you count Tim Duncan’s U.S. Virgin Islands place of birth). This means that at least eight of their players came of age elsewhere (a remarkable number). I began to think about a hypothetical summer road trip in which Pop takes the team on a tour of every player’s hometown (and you know if this would contribute to more wins, he would decide to embark on such a trip in a time period shorter than his average sideline reporter television interview). This fantastic idea led to the topic for this second installment of “Rank Everything.” Without further ado…

14) North Babylon, NY (hometown of Danny Green)Danny Green

Why North Babylon? I am sure it is a lovely town…North Babylon High

Why not North Babylon? It is in the middle of Long Island and not on the coast; A “vacation” and the headline “Squatters are spoiling North Babylon” do not mix so well together

A little taste of North Babylon culture:

13) Concord, NH (hometown of Matt Bonner)Matt Bonner

Why Concord? Concord is a lovely, quintessential New England state capital; It is within driving distance from my house; It was originally settled by a man named Ebenezer; Matt Bonner is awesome; There is a statue of the esteemed President Franklin Pierce “downtown”Concord, NH

Why not Concord? New Hampshire’s “Live free or die” motto doesn’t ever sit well; Ten days is a long time to spend vacationing in Concord, NH; the Massachusetts (blatant bias) Concord is better; The Concord police force needs to chill

A little taste of Concord culture:

12) Ontario, CA (hometown of Jeff Ayres – the artist formally known as Jeff Pendergraph)Jeff Ayres

Why Ontario? Ontario has an airport; Ontario sports the self-professed largest mystery murder dinner show in America; Ontario has an annual “Pancake Breakfast and Car show” and are notable pioneers for even considering this concept; Landon Donovan is a resident; By all accounts, it is kind of a beautiful placeOntario, CA

Why not Ontario? The last edition of Kenny Rogers Roasters closed in 2011 and this the saddest of news; known as the “gateway to Southern California” – gateways to places are never as fun as the places themselves; Jeff Ayres is not exactly the most compelling member of the San Antonio Spurs

A little taste of Ontario culture:

11) Riverside, CA (hometown of Kawhi Leonard)Kawhi Leonard

Why Riverside? The birthplace of the CA citrus industry; the largest Mission Revival building in the country; 47 minute drive to the Pacific; Riverside has 28 neighborhoods and neighborhoods are wonderful to exploreRiverside, Ca

Why not Riverside? Referred to as a “smog belt” – pollution is a problem; It is close, but still a 47 minute drive to the ocean in Los Angeles is not a 47 minute drive; This annual Dickens festival seems more creepy than cool

A little taste of Riverside culture:

10) Irvine, CA (hometown of Austin Daye)Austin Daye

Why Irvine? The weather is almost always sunny and warm; The presence of an In-N-Out Burger; Some cool movies have filmed there; Will Ferrell is a resident; I always liked Austin’s father Darren Daye; It is the safest big city in the country (populations over 100,000)Irvine, CA

Why not Irvine? In 1918 there were 60,000 acres of lima beans grown on the Irvine Ranch – I don’t like lima beans; Irvine is apparently the home to Jim Rome and Aubrey O’Day

A little taste of Irvine culture:

9) Canberra, Australia (hometown of Patty Mills)Patty Mills

Why Canberra? Canberra has tried to do some wonderful environmental things with greenhouse gas emissions and waste; The Shine Dome; Home to the National Folk Festival and the Royal Canberra Show and who doesn’t want to attend an agricultural show with rides – there is “so much fun to be had”Canberra

Why not Canberra? It’s not Sydney or Melbourne; The flight to get there is going to take an incredibly long time; Although close, Canberra is not on the ocean; Winter in Canberra is winter; “That’s no harbor, that’s a lake (a fake lake!)”; A great place to be a bureaucrat

A little taste of Canberra culture:

8) Joinville, Brazil (hometown of Tiago Splitter)Tiago Splitter

Why Joinville? The climate is “always relatively hot”; interesting history of German descendants; The only city other than Moscow to house a branch of the Bolshoi Ballet; Home to the “world’s largest dance festival”Joinville

Why not Joinville? Close, but not on the water; not the most diverse city in Brazil; It is far from Sau Paulo and even further from Rio; the tragic fights at a football game in December are not too welcoming to tourists

A little taste of Joinville culture:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRZ4FnB7WKk

7) Toronto, Canada (hometown of Cory Joseph)

Cory Joseph

Why Toronto? Toronto has both an American and European flavor; It is the manageable kind of large metropolis that you can experience on a ten day vacation; Rob Ford as a menace to society and as a perfect example of Tyson Zone potential; Rob Ford press conferences; the pronunciation of the word “Toronto” with a Canadian accentToronot

Why not Toronto? Rob Ford; The fact that the people of Toronto seem to tolerate Rob Ford; The Raptors and Blue Jays are usually really bad; The cold in the winters is really cold

A little taste of Toronto culture:

6) Bahia Blanca, Argentina (hometown of Manu Ginobili)Manu Ginobili

Why Bahia Blanca? The city was founded as a fortress! There is a daily train to nearby (relatively) Buenos Aires; There are two zoos! Manu Ginobili is a national treasure – any place that Manu Ginobili calls home is a place I want to visit; It is on the Atlantic OceanBahía BlancaWhy not Bahia Blanca? Although a port city, you have to travel a little ways to get to real beaches for swimming

A little taste of Bahia Blanca culture:

5) Cormeilles-en-Parisis, France (hometown of Boris Diaw)Boris Diaw

Why Cormeilles-en-Parisis? It is where Boris Diaw is from (this should say it all); A quiet suburb of Paris? Yes, please; It has an awesome fortCormeilles-en-Parisis

Why not Cormeilles-en-Parisis? It is landlocked; You are inevitably going to want to take transport to Paris during many of your ten days

A little taste of Cormeilles-en-Parisis culture:

4) San Giovanni in Persiceto, Italy (hometown of Marco Belinelli)Marco Belinelli

Why San Giovanni in Persiceto? It’s in Italy; There is a castle where you can stay; Some of its history goes back to the year 728; There was a healthy anti-facist resistance force during World War II; It’s in ItalySan Giovanni in Persiceto

Why not San Giovanni in Persiceto? It is not on the water and is a little bit of a distance from larger cities; It may be a better place to live than a place to vacation

A little taste of San Giovanni in Persiceto culture:

3) Bruges, Belgium (hometown of Tony Parker)

Tony Parker

Why Bruges? “One of the most romantic places I have been to” – Deniz; Sometimes referred to as the “Venice of the North” because of its canal system; The city is about 1300 years old; Most of its medieval architecture is still intact; The city still employs a full-time carillonneur to work the bells of the 13th Century belfry; If you want to live history (as I do!) on your San Antonio Spurs player hometown trip, Bruges may be your best choiceBruges

Why not Bruges? Bruges is known for its lace – I am not sure this is a good thing; The recent movie In Bruges starring Colin Farrell put me to sleep

A little taste of Bruges culture:

2) Christiansted, Saint Croix, US Virgin Islands (hometown of Tim Duncan)Tim Duncan

Why Christiansted? Christiansted has a near perfect tropical climate for beach activities; Alexander Hamilton was once a resident and then moved to New York and helped found the United States; Tim Duncan was once a resident and then moved to San Antonio to begin a fifteen years (and counting!) NBA dynasty; Christiansted has some cays and cays are awesome; Island hopping!Christiansted

Why not Christiansted? Hard to avoid its checkered history as a Danish colony town built by African slaves; Tropical paradise is not the right vacation for all

A little taste of Christiansted culture:

1) Gisborne, New Zealand (hometown of Aron Baynes)

Aron Baynes

Why Gisborne? The possibility that there is a “Sir Guy”; Beautiful beaches with great surf; The annual Rhythm and Vines Music Festival; Gisborne often makes skinny dipping world record attempts; Potential for Lord of the Rings sites day trips; First city in the world to see the sun each day (for part of the year)Gisborne

Why not Gisborne? It is a trek to get there

A little taste of Gisborne culture:

What do you all think?  Did I underrate any destinations? Did I overrate any destinations?  How would your rankings differ?

Blog Posts, Music, Television

World: Meet Sam Smith

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Saturday Night Live has been the platform for many a star creation. Belushi. Murray. Murphy. Myers. Farley. Ferrell. Fey. Fallon. Poehler. Meyers. Piscopo (Well, maybe not Joe Piscopo). The most successful guest hosts (Tom Hanks, Alec Baldwin) take advantage of the freedom of the sketch comedy show institution (and frequently the highest rated NBC show not associated with “Sunday” and “Football”)  to showcase their comedic range and acting chops. SNL musical acts are always a little bit of a wild card. You have your legends coming on to promote their longevity and boost ratings (Paul McCartney, Mick Jagger), legends who provide the nation a way to grieve (Paul Simon’s incredible rendition of “The Boxer” on the first SNL show after 9/11), musical heavyweights promoting a record (U2, Coldplay, Kanye), musical acts who host (Justin Timberlake, Drake, Britney), artists on the verge of arriving (The Lumineers), and artists who provide incredible unintentional comedy opportunities (Just watch this The Crash Test Dummies – mind you, this was a hit). The final category of musical acts, the almost complete unknowns to most viewers coming into their potentially career altering SNL appearance, either make something special of it (YouTube created Karmin came out of relative obscurity to perform on a 2012 SNL show and subsequently made themselves into a viable commercial success) or fall to even greater obscurity (where did you go, Alabama Shakes?).

This past weekend, Louis C. K. hosted a show with a musical act from the latter category. When I first heard that “Sam Smith” would be appearing alongside my fellow Newton North Tiger alumnus, Louis C.K., the following questions came to mind:
1) Who is Sam Smith?
2) What other musical act cancelled in order for SNL producers to choose someone no one had heard of?
3) Is this the same Sam Smith as the long-time Chicago sports columnist?
4) If so, did Louis C.K. select him as some kind of off-beat extension of his standup act?
5) Will they actually have him perform twice?
6) What other things can I fit into my day now that my DVR re-watch will go that much faster after having skipped Sam Smith’s performances?
7) Again, who is Sam Smith?

Thankfully, I decided to give Sam Smith a shot and my future musical listening experiences will always be the better for it. This soulful, passionate, gorgeous vocalist is part Adele, part David Gray (in his majestic, ethereal tone), part dead ringer for early Culture Club Boy George, and all kinds of awesome. If you missed SNL this past weekend and were as in the dark as I was, let me introduce you to the light that is Sam Smith.

Watch to behold the majesty that is…

"The Challenge", Features, Television

THE CHALLENGE: FREE AGENTS Preseason Power Rankings – Men Division – Part II

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Read Part I of the MEN DIVISION here.

PRESEASON POWER RANKINGS – MEN DIVISION

RETURN TO FORM

6) LEROYLeroyWhere did we last see him? We last saw Leroy and partner Ty come up short against rookie sensations Jordan and Marlon in the Jungle elimination of episode seven of last season’s Rivals 2.
The Challenge History: Free Agents is Leroy’s fourth season on The Challenge. Previous appearances were in Rivals (season 21 and a trip to the finals with Mikey Mike), Battle of the Exes (season 22), and Rivals 2 (season 24).
Why would you sign Leroy? Leroy is straightforward and direct. He tells you what he thinks, but has the stature and respect of his fellow competitors. He is a phenomenal athlete who competes at the highest level in a number of events. He is well-regarded by both the Johnny Bananas and CT power trees of the modern Challenge era. He is a loyal friend and will always have the back of those that are close to him.
Why would you not sign Leroy? Since a breakout The Challenge rookie campaign, his performances in Battle of the Exes and Rivals 2 (partners Naomi and Ty may have had a little something to do with this) fell a little short. Sometimes you have to get a little dirty to be successful on The Challenge and this may not come naturally to Leroy.
Potential Allies: Dustin and Nany (Real World: Las Vegas Strong); Brandon (Las Vegas Strong); Johnny Bananas and CT
Potential Enemies: From strictly a competitive standpoint, the other most physically gifted competitors like Zach, Frank, and Jordan
Best-case scenario: Based upon expectations and/or track record, Leroy has never been matched with the best partner. Thankfully, when Adam Royer embarrassed himself on the first few days of Rivals, his replacement was Leroy’s best bud, Mike, from Real World: Las Vegas. Their strong relationship propelled them to exceed expectations. Both Naomi and Ty were going to limit Leroy’s ultimate staying power in his last two seasons. Now, unencumbered by a fatal partnership on Free Agents, Leroy will be able to do his solo thing, compete against the frontrunners, and have a legitimate shot to compete in the finals.
Worst-case scenario: Either he is targeted to go into an elimination because he is such a big threat or he falls victim to “The Draw” against one of the game’s elite physical competitors (CT, Zach) and loses an close battle.
The Verdict: I incorrectly predicted that Rivals 2 would be Leroy’s season (a preseason MVP prediction) to “make the leap.” It is time to go at least a few steps out on that lim again: Leroy will be around for at least the final elimination before the finals. Free Agents will be his return to form, but due to the stiffest competition he has faced, this may not be “the leap” season quite yet.

THE NEW ELITE

5) DUSTINDustinWhere did we last see him? We last saw Dustin instrumentally drive his faltering relationship with Trishelle to a second place finish in the Namibian Desert Battle of the Seasons final challenge.
The Challenge History: This is Dustin’s third season on The Challenge. Previously he was on Battle of the Exes (season 22) and Battle of the Seasons (season 23 and a finals trip).
Why would you sign Dustin? Dustin is an outstanding athlete and may have more of an issue with losing than any of the other twenty-seven competitors this season (he likes to win!). He is a loyal supporter of his fellow Las Vegas cast members (Nany and Leroy) and has proved that he will always have their back. He will excel in a number of different types of challenges. He is headstrong and fearless.
Why would you not sign Dustin? Sometimes his tireless pursuit of winning can rub less-inclined competitors the wrong way. His motivational tactics are not always supportive (more like Frank than like Leroy). If his enemies stay true from Battle of the Seasons, they are powerful players in this game.
Potential Allies: Nany and Leroy (Las Vegas Strong); Jemmye (New Orleans Strong); he and Chet worked well together on separate teams during Battle of the Seasons
Potential Enemies: Frank and Zach
Best-case scenario: Dustin has always been destined for The Challenge greatness and Free Agents, through frequent challenge domination and sound alliance building, could be the season that he wins in the finals.
Worst-case scenario: Sometimes taking a season off after a finals trip can be a momentum killer. A challenge DQ places an early elimination target on Dustin’s back that forces him to battle with one of the other elite players who is ultimately too much to overcome.
The Verdict: Free Agents is tailor-made for a competitor of Dustin’s skill set. He will excel with a solo mission (especially away from his frequent, albeit at times warranted, frustration with female teammates) format and will return to the finals with a plausible opportunity to win.

4) FRANKFrankWhere did we last see him? We last saw Frank and teammate Johnny Bananas get outlasted and outplayed in the Rivals 2 final challenge by eventual winners CT and Wes.
The Challenge History: Amazingly, this is Frank’s third season on The Challenge. He won Battle of the Seasons (season 23) as the vocal leader of Team San Diego and made it to the finals again last year as Johnny Bananas twitter sparring partner (some rivalry) on Rivals 2 (season 24).
Why would you sign Frank? His track record speaks for itself – two seasons in and Frank has proved himself as one of the elite Challenge competitors. His second season, despite an early CT mashup, was the most drama free of his Bunim-Murray tenure. He is in peak physical form, one of, if not the the best, swimmer, and may have more running endurance (until Preston can prove himself!) than any other guy. His strategic game is Johnny Bananas-level elite.
Why would you not sign Frank? Despite this mellower version of himself, there are several competitors this season who have been recipients of Frank’s nighttime extra-curricular activity blow-ups and may want to enact some degree of revenge. He may benefit from a more team-oriented game suited to his strategic advantages. After a free-flowing and potentially contract-breaking interview on Grantland’s Right Reasons podcast with Juliet Litman and Dave Jacoby last season, his positive energy toward the franchise may have wained.
Potential Allies: Johnny Bananas (they created a mutually beneficial partnership last year surprisingly well); Jordan; Are he and Zach close again?
Potential Enemies: CT; Dustin; Nany; Chet; Camila
Best-case scenario: Frank once again dominates the social/strategic game while backing up his supremacy with consistently strong performances in challenges. This leads to his third straight finals appearance in three tries and a credible shot to win it all.
Worst-case scenario: Frank’s past enemies pounce on him early. Unprotected from a team or partnership, he must face off in an early elimination against a strong competitor who ends up beating him.
The Verdict: Something feels a little strange of about Frank heading into this Challenge season. Promos have been noticeably leaving him out (he had been a fixture the last two seasons), which leads me to believe that he will not be hanging out in Uruguay for too long a time. This is just conjecture – a hunch – but something doesn’t feel right (I was surprised to even hear he participated after his Bunim-Murray fall out last season). I could be completely off-base (as has happened many times before), but I have a feeling that this is not going to be one of Frank’s best seasons. I would graciously like to be proved wrong, but for now, I predict an early exit.

3) JORDANJordanWhere did we last see him? We last saw rookies Jordan and Real World: Portland partner, Marlon, destroy their Rivals 2 competition, leading to a finals appearance (at least to day 1) and a third place finish.
The Challenge History: Free Agents will be Jordan’s sophomore season on The Challenge. Last year he made it to the finals on Rivals 2 (season 24).
Why would you sign Jordan? Jordan is an INCREDIBLE athlete who seems to excel at everything you put in front of him. He won “Rookie of the Year” in my postseason awards column and he was a legitimate MVP candidate. His competitiveness is aptly matched by his unwavering will to fight against adversity. He is unafraid and will stand up to anyone, but gets when it is time to take a backseat to the strategic in-fighting of others. Made for the Free Agents format because he has the chance to dominate all individual challenges (the only ticket to safety against the unpredictability of “The Draw”).
Why would you not sign Jordan? You would sign Jordan. His inherent pugnacity could be used against him.
Potential Allies: Jess, Johnny, and Nia (Portland Strong); I see he and Cohutta getting along really well, the women competitors in general
Potential Enemies: As previewed in the trailer, Johnny Bananas; the rest of the competition
Best-case scenario: He dominates challenges, avoids eliminations, and makes the right alliances to find himself in a return trip to the finals with a totally credible opportunity to win.
Worst-case scenario: The worst-case scenario is that his greatest foes are hip to his potential threat and keep putting him into eliminations to test his might. After several wins, Jordan’s luck runs out against another elite player selected by “The Draw.”
The Verdict: Jordan will not have a sophomore slump, will ride the momentum from an outstanding rookie campaign on Rivals 2 to several challenge wins, and will be back competing in the finals as once again, a potential season MVP candidate.

LEGENDARY STATUS

2) JOHNNY BANANASJohnny BananasWhere did we last see him? We last saw Johnny Bananas graciously cede his The Challenge crown to long-time and deserved foe, CT, in the Rivals 2 final challenge.
The Challenge History: Free Agents is Johnny Bananas’ tenth season on The Challenge. He has previously appeared in The Duel (season 13), The Inferno 3 (season 14), The Gauntlet III (season 15), The Island (season 16), The Ruins (season 18), Cutthroat (season 20), Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), and Rivals 2 (season 24). He has been to the finals six times and has won four times (The Island, The Ruins, Rivals, Battle of the Exes).
Why would you sign Johnny Bananas? Johnny Bananas is the most successful competitor in The Challenge history. His brand of excellent physical play, strategic genius, and brash competitiveness has been instrumental in solidifying The Challenge’s fifth MAPS (Major American Professional Sport) status. Still in his prime, he has been to three straight finals (with two wins). He can work with even the most unexpected competitor (as he proved last season with Frank) and will forge mutually beneficial relationships that push him further in the game. He has strong relationships with many guys and girls.
Why would you not sign Bananas? His final challenge performance last season was a little bit of a disappointment (even if last season seemed to be all about destiny’s child, CT, finally getting over the victory hump) and showed some cracks in his armor. The journey to win a solo game like Free Agents will be one of the hardest obstacles Johnny Bananas has faced in his ten seasons. Some of his consummate and loyal supporters are not participating this season (Paula is having a baby! Kenny and Evan are still not allowed to participate?)
Potential Allies: Just going down the list, depending on what is in his best strategic interest: Frank, Leroy, Jordan, CT, Laurel, Aneesa, Dustin, Jemmye, Camila, Jessica, Brandon, Preston, Cohutta
Potential Enemies: Respected foe CT; respected competitor Jordan; there is no love loss between Johnny and Cara (although their may strategic alignment benefit).
Best-case scenario: With Johnny’s track record and continued excellence, a finals appearance and a Challenge win are consistently in play.
Worst-case scenario: Free Agents could force Johnny to compete early and often in eliminations, something he frequently avoids. Father time will come to him at some point on The Challenge. Will this be the year?
The Verdict: Further inspired by a disappointing finals, Johnny (and his Bobblehead) will be back this season with a vengeance. Whilst facing his own Challenge mortality, I look for this to be a classic Johnny Bananas performance and a record seventh finals appearance.

WATCH THE BANANAS PROMO

1) CTCTWhere did we last see him? We last saw CT and his long-standing nuisance and rival Wes put their differences aside and ride a dominant performance in Rivals 2 to his first The Challenge win.
The Challenge History: Like Johnny, Free Agents will be CT’s tenth season on The Challenge. He has previously appeared on The Inferno (season 8), The Inferno II (season 10), The Duel (season 13), The Inferno 3 (season 14), The Gauntlet III (season 15), The Duel II (season 17), Rivals (season 21), Battle of the Exes (season 22), Rivals 2 (season 24). He has been to five finals. Rivals 2 was his first win.
Why would you sign CT? Like Johnny Bananas, CT is one of the handful of competitors that has spearheaded the development of The Challenge as the fifth MAPS (Major American Professional Sport). He is a physical animal who has been striking fear in the competition since season 8 (season 8!). CT’s training and strategic game have greatly improved over the last several seasons. He has never been better and is peaking at a time in his career when he should be taking a few steps backwards. CT is the ultimate “Free Agent.” Under all circumstances, you would rather have CT on your side than against you. Diem is not on this season, so CT is devoid of what could be traditionally his biggest distraction (although it didn’t seem to affect him much last season).
Why would you not sign CT? Will he lose some competitive momentum and drive after finally getting over the finals hump last year? He always going to be a target and will have even more people gunning for him this year. His bodyguard, Knight, will not be participating.
Potential Allies: Isaac (although, we are not sure if he really has his back according to one of the promos); Aneesa, Laurel, and Cara Maria (you will not find three stronger woman); women that are seduced by his charms
Potential Enemies: long-time and respected foe, Johnny Bananas; Frank
Best-case scenario: The taste of victory was sweet for CT and he wants some of the action again. No one will want to chance going up against him in an elimination, so “The Draw” may be the only way he sees an elimination. He rides this protection to another finals appearance and a chance at winning two Challenges in a row.
Worst-case scenario: The worst-case scenario is that CT loses some of his edge and just wants to have a relaxing vacation. He loses “The Draw” and then underestimates one of the new elite (Dustin, Frank, Jordan, Zach, Leroy) in an elimination.
The Verdict: The reigning champion and the reigning MVP will want a taste for more and there aren’t too many competitors out there with much of a chance to stop him. He should be returning to the finals.

WATCH THE CT PROMO

NEXT UP: Part I of the Women Division

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